R64: A Dose of Dr. Mario

Retarded64: A Dose of Dr. Mario is the fifth installment of Retarded64. It is how Dr. Mario (didn't) become a doctor, with disastrous results.

The transcript can be viewed here.

Plot
The blooper opens with a classroom inside a medical school on finals day. Suddenly, Mario bursts through one of the walls signing, but is silenced. He takes the test (though he doesn't answer any of the questions, and the only other person taking the test is a Shy Guy who keeps screaming "YEAH, TOAST!"). Despite failing, Mario still manages to land a job as a doctor.

His first patient soon comes in, appearently having a seizure. He picks the patient up, and throws him through a window, convinced he has cured him.

Next, a Koopa in need of immediate medical attention is given to Mario, and the doctors leave the room. After a few seconds, they come back, but Mario and the Koopa are nowhere to be found. It is then revealed that Mario simply threw the Koopa off the roof, telling him to go to Mexico.

Mario is then shown walking down the street, and encounters a little girl crying over a dropped ice cream cone, so he gives her some candy to cheer her up. He is mistaken for a pedophile, ambushed and beaten by several Police officers.

Next, we see that the Shy Guy from the medical school, still screaming "YEAH TOAST!", is in need of a heart transplant. Mario, instead of preforming surgery, is raging against a drink machine that has eaten his money. Link appears, and offers Mario a water bottle. Mario trades the heart he needs for the surgery for the water bottle, only to find that the bottle is empty, enraging him further.

It is then shown that Luigi has become a doctor called "Dr. Luigi", just for Mario to smack down his hat, much to Luigi's dismay.

Then, Mario is shown outside Peach's castle, where he encounters a large virus. He throws medication at it, but when that fails to kill it, he takes out a minigun and begins firing pills at the virus.

It is then shown that Mario finds a green pill, consumes it, and begins having vivid hallucinations. It is then shown Mario OD'd and is having a seizure, while another doctor looks to the camera and tells the viewer not to do drugs because it's bad.

It is then shown Mario seeing a lollipop attached to a man's butt. He crawls towards it to take it, but the man misinterprets what Mario was doing, and yells "PERVERT". Mario is once again attacked by the Police.

It is then shows a person lying face down in a pool of blood in the middle of a supermarket next to a man calling for a doctor. It then shows Dr. Mario slowly leaving the scene.

Mario is then back at the hospital, when an old guy arrives and asks Mario to revive his Pikachu. Mario injects the Pikachu with a drug causing it to explode.

Mario, sick of failing, is determined to really help his next patient (:o). He then sees a crazed Teletubby (Tinky Winky) being restrained by his friends. Mario puts the Tubby onto a gurney and wheels it into the ER. Mario realizes that there's something inside the Tubby, and thinks he is pregnant. He tells the Tubby to spread his legs and push, but something attacks Mario with lasers. Mario, along with (some) assistance from Toad, prepares the Tubby, and begins giving it pills. What happens next is unknown, as SMG4 skips to the ending. The Tubby screams, and a little baby horse pops out of it. Mario, triumphant, holds up the horse baby, his first sucessful patient. It is then revealed to be a mutant Robotnik-Horse Hybrid.

Characters

 * Mario (as Dr. Mario)


 * Shy Guy


 * Princess Peach 189px-PINGAAAS.png


 * Koopa


 * Ivo Robotnik (cameo)


 * The Cops


 * Link


 * Luigi (as Dr. Luigi)
 * Old Man


 * Pikachu


 * Teletubby


 * Toad
 * Robotnik Horse

Trivia

 * The original title of this video was misspelled as Retarted64, but has been changed after the YouTuber "Jacob Herzog" (also called "The Zog") notified the mistake to SuperMarioGlitchy4
 * Mario is seen playing Surgeon Simulator 2013 in the hospital.
 * According to this blooper, Dr. Mario is a very bad doctor.
 * The audio during the transition scenes is from the Dr. Mario music video by Brentalfloss. So is the credits song.
 * the scene where mario and toad operate the teletubbie is from the the video Yoshi Drops.