Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Who let the Chomp out?/Transcript

The plot starts at Bob-Omb Battlefield.

SMG4: Mario...is talking to goombas even a good idea?

Mario: Of course! This is for science.

Koopa Troopa: (Runs naked) mom get the camera!!!

Mario: (wearing a Goomba head) Hello!! it's-a me...

(The Goombas look at Mario confused)

Mario: (wearing a Goomba head) WAAAAZZZ UP!!!

SMG4: speak goomba you idiot!...

Mario: (still wearing a Goomba head) Okydoky, get ready to move your penis.

SMG4: STOO-PID!!

Goomba: Umm...

Mario: (Wearing a Goomba head) Ohh i got an idea! I'll do the mating call! (Stomps the Goomba) YATATATATATATATTA UUU BURADADADA...

Other Goomba: OH!! NO!!! (He and the Koopa explodes)

Mario: hmm...?

(A lot of Goombas apear behind Mario and they attack him)

(Mario screams like a little girl)

Other Goomba: MY BABY!!!

SMG4: Ehh, close enough.

Mario: Thanks for helping D:<

SMG4: Oh hey! no problem :D

Mario: Grr! Mama f**er! You know what screw this!

Mario: Imma go play with the chomp!

SMG4: NO NO DUDE NO NO DON'T!!!

Chain Chomp: (barking) (he sees mario and hits him)

Mario: Grr! What is it?!

SMG4: Don't go near that dog! you might release it idiot!

Mario: Oh no... (goes to the pole) that's no-

SMG4: DON'T GO FULL-RETARD ON ME NOW!

Mario: Fine!

(Meanwhile, A pink Bob-omb is spying on Mario, the Chain Chomp, and SMG4)

Pink Bob-Omb: Oh hell no!!

(Then he and another Bob-Omb says: They took our dog! multiple times)

(The cannon loads)

The Gourmet Guy: *pops out of cannon* Hellooooo!

Pink Bob-Omb: Fire!!

The Gourmet Guy: *gets shot out of cannon* I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky...

Mario: Oh brother, Mama mia. (Looks up and gets surprised)

The Gourment Guy: (screams down on mario)

Mario: OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHI-

(The Gourment Guy squashes Mario)

SMG4: (gasp)

(SMG4 runs to Mario and when I say run to Mario I mean that he runs to the pole)

SMG4: ARE YOU OK POLE?

(goes to The Gourment Guy)

SMG4: Thanks alot fata$$.

(The Gourment Guy starts dancing to "This is what I do, I sit on you" until Mario gets up and pushes him onto the pole)

Mario: You son of a bitch!!!!!!

SMG4: RUN BITCH, RUN!!!

Mario: Hmm? *notices that the pole holding the chain chomp is broken* AAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *runs away*

(The Chain Chomp starts chasing Mario and SMG4. "Who Let the Dogs Out?" starts playing in the background.)

Koopa Troopa: What with all the screa- OH MY FUCKING G-

Chain Chomp: (Riding a car) IT'S RAPING TIME.

(An Old Man is seen singing)

Mario: (addressing to the Old Man) Get Over Here!!

(Mario grabs up the Old Man throws him to the Chain Chomp and the Old Man screams like a girl)

Luigi: (Gets out of a pipe) Mario!

Mario: Luigi! MOVE!!

Luigi: Every day Mario...

Mario: Bye bye!!

(Luigi sees the Chain Chomp and starts running with Mario and SMG4)

(The 3 friends appear at Peach's castle underground)

(The Chain Chomp is seen still making his way through the pipe)

Mario: Oh shit...

???: (giggles)

(Mario turns around and sees a bunch of Toads)

Toads: Oh, Hey Mario!!!

(Mario uses the Toads to plug the pipe but fails)

(In the Hall of Peach's Castle)

Peach: WHAT THE FU-

SMG4: RUN BITCH, RUN!!!!

(Then Toad, Luigi, SMG4, Mario and Peach get in one of the castle's room)

(Outside of the room)

Chain Chomp: (Barks)

(Inside of the room)

Luigi: Oh... (Faints)

Toad: WTF was that!?!?

SMG4: That...was a scary Chain Chomp...

Mario: I don't want to die!

SMG4: Don't worry Mario! we just have to wait and people will come find us!

(suddenly an alarm sounds)

Peach: AHHHH THE MEATLOAF!

(Then a stove on the second floor starts burning, Peach gets out of the room but gets trapped by the Chain Chomp)

Chain Chomp: (barks)

Peach: Fuck!!! (screams)

(Then Peach gets back to the room, she is beaten up and her dress is broken)

Peach: My scrotums!

SMG4: What!!??

SMG4: DID YOU LEAVE THE STOVE ON PEACH!?

Peach: Oh yeah!!

SMG4: *gets angry* You. Stupid. Bitch!

SMG4: This whole place is going to burn down if no one turns off that stove!

Toad: Don't worry! us Toads are reliable!

Toad: We'll be able to turn it off!

(then the scene changes to the second floor in which the stove is still on and the Toads are burning)

SMG4: We can't just sit around! We need to fix this now!

Luigi: (addressing to Mario) and YOU gotta help us!

Mario: NO!!!

SMG4: It would be a real shame for that Chain Chomp to eat the spaghetti.

Mario: No...!! No, no, no!! HELL NO!!!

(Then Mario goes outside the room in which the Chain Chomp is sleeping. Mario tries to make a Pole to engange the Chain Chomp but the doorbell rings and the Chain Chomp goes outside)

Chain Chomp: Hi, how can I help you!?!?

Sonic: Hey hey hey! I'm Sonic. Sonic the hedgehog!

Chain Chomp: WTF IS A SONIC?!?!?!?

(Sonic looks confused at the Chain Chomp)

Chain Chomp: ...Wanna be friends?

(Then the Chain Chomp enters very happy in the castle becouse now he has a friend,he goes to the fridge and eats Mario's spaghetti but he falls asleep with it in his mouth)

Mario: Oh no f**king way!

(Mario tries to eat the Spaghetti from the Chomp's mouth while SMG4 shakes his head.)

Mario: UGH!! IT TASTES LIKE SH*T!!!

(Chomp wakes up, Mario continues eat the spaghetti. Chomp groans)

Mario: La la la!

(the Chain Chomp fires a lazer/lazar from his mouth, blowing Mario's head off)

(Back in the room)

Mario: (headless) Mama f**er!

(SMG4 groans)

(The camera switches to Toad and Peach, who are playing Super Smash Bros (Toad as Kirby and Peach as Samus) Toad is winning and dances in front on Peach and in her face)

SMG4: Uhh Mario have you seen Luigi?

Mario: Luigi said that he wanted to help. so I told him to go turn off the stove.

SMG4: What!!!???

(Then on the second floor Luigi successfully turns off the stove. LUIGI SAVES THE DAY!!! ... but everything is still burning.)

Luigi: go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee! go weegee!

(Luigi ends up flaming on the floor in front of Mario)

Mario: Well, he's-a my bro, he had nothing to do and he was up for it.

SMG4: Oh, I guess that makes sense.

(Then Luigi gets thrown into the room in which chain chomp is)

SMG4: Did the bait work!?

Mario: Where'd that Chain Chomp go?!

(Then some of chain chomp's barks and stomping are heard)

SMG4: hey wait...did you hear that?

(Then in the room Peach and Toad are playing Mario Party 9, they are fighting Chain Chomp. When suddenly he breaks out of the TV)

Chain Chomp: Surprise motherf**ker!

(Peach and Toad scream and the Chain Chomp get them out of the room)

(Mario and SMG4 scream and try to open the Castle door but The Gourmet Guy is blocking it, while listening to "This is what I do, I sit on you".)

(The four friends think that they are screwed when Toadsworth appears)

Toadsworth: Get out of here! I'll stop it!

SMG4: TOADSWORTH?

Mario: What're you gonna do? Throw your walking stick!

Toadsworth: (Puts on a Princess dress) (Giggles) Bitch!

Toadsworth: INCOMING!! (GETS A MINIGUN AND SHOOTS THE CHAIN CHOMP WILE HE SINGS "I'm not your daddy i'm your grandpa!" (WOW))

(Then SMG4 and Mario open the second floor but when they open a Toad burning appears saying "Im on fire!" (the fire because Luigi didn't turn off the stove on time) and then they decide to go to the garden)

(Toadsworth's minigun runs out of ammo and the Chain Chomp gets a gun)

Toadsworth: Come at me bro. You Mad?

(Then the Chain Chomp shoots Ivo Robotnik out of the gun which says "pingas!!" and makes a K.O to Toadsworth)

Mario: (Screams and fails)

Peach: RUN BITCH, RUN!!! (Then she and Toad get in a room)

Mario: Go on...with out me...

SMG4: Okie-Dokie!

Mario: You son of a Bitch!!!!

(When Mario is going to open the garden door, the Chain Chomp gets out of the garden and he chases Mario and SMG4 to the basement.)

SMG4: ...Ok...i think we lost it...

Mario: (cries)

SMG4: Don't be like that! We're gonna live.

Chain Chomp: (In another room) (barks)

SMG4: uh-oh.

Mario: Game over. Bye bye… Luigi, Princess, Bowser, Toad... You son of a Bitch!!!!

SMG4: Hey! Be a man!

Mario: It's not possible!

???: Wow what an asshole.

(Then Mario turns around and sees...THAT THE CHAIN CHOMP IS BEHIND HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Chain Chomp: (Barks)

SMG4: Stay back! I'm warning you!

Chain Chomp: PREPARE YOUR BUTT!

SMG4: (Screams like a girl and throws a power star at the Chain Chomp which turns into a Pac-Chomp)

Mario: (addressing to SMG4) You are STOOPID!

SMG4: Shut the fuck up!!!

(The Pac-Chomp chases Mario and SMG4; during the chase the basement turns into a Pac-Man map until SMG4 and Mario end up in an impass)

Mario: oh no.

SMG4: well.. crap...

Pac-Chomp: (Turns back into Chain Chomp) (barks)

Mario: (Grew some balls) I'm sick of your shit! *pulls out a Bom-Omb*

SMG4: NO NO DUDE NO NO DON'T

Mario: (Throws a Bob-Omb at the Chain Chomp)

Chain Chomp: (cries) I just wanted to be your friend!

SMG4: (cries) I'm so sorry...

Mario: (interrupting)I don't give a fuck.

(The Chain Chomp gets blown away away from the castle)

(Later in Bob-Omb Battlefield a Pink Bob-Omb is at the Chain Chomp's pole thinking that he is dead while there are other two Bob-Ombs)

Other Pink Bob-Omb: They took his dog!

Bob-Omb: (untelligible word)

(Then the Chain Chomp squashes the Pink Bob Omb, killing him)

Other Pink Bob-Omb: Holy fuck!

Bob-Omb: (untelligible word)

(back to Peach's Castle)

Mario:  (Giggles) Oh yeah!

(Then the camera turns to the Castle which is burning down and the biggest tower is destroyed)

Mario: And nothing of value was lost.

The End :D