R64: Mario's Boat Trip is the twenty-second episode of Season 7 and the 346 overall to be uploaded by SMG4.
This is also the last officially named Retarded64 episode, which was followed by the series's discontinuation. This episode is a sequel to R64: Mario's Road Trip. This episode was also formerly known as Retarded64: Mario's Boat Trip due to YouTube's change of policy from June 12, 2017. This is the second of the three videos under the Mario's Trip miniseries. It was aired on June 4, 2017.
The episode begins in the harbor of Delfino Plaza, where SMG4 was forcing Mario to travel by boat for their next vacation, seeing as how badly things turned out the last time they went by airplane (referencing the events of SM64 Christmas 2015 - Christmas Crazies) despite Mario saying that would not happen again. The two of them met up with Toad, who planned on taking them in his own boat. At first, Mario thought that it was the yacht behind Toad, but was soon disappointed to find that it was actually a tiny, old motorboat.
Mario continued to whine as the three of them left the harbor. SMG4 tried to get him to stop by reminding him that the vacation they were going to was at Didney Sea. It worked and Mario quickly became excited and eagerly bounced around the boat, eventually invading Toad's personal space. Toad pushed him off and asked SMG4 to keep the crazed plumber as far away from him as possible so he could focus on driving the boat.
They all sailed further out to sea, with Toad driving the boat while listening to music, SMG4 gaining seasickness and vomiting over the side, and Mario being restrained inside of a life preserver to keep himself from bouncing eagerly around. Mario eventually interrupted Toad once more, complaining that his butt was itching and demanding Toad to scratch it for him. Toad demanded him to leave him alone, but the plumber's only response was to taunt him by saying that he did not care. Toad ultimately got fed up with Mario and threw him into the water, keeping him tethered to the back of the boat with a rope as punishment.
As Toad drove the boat faster, dragging Mario behind him, SMG4 pulled out of a piece of candy to relieve his seasickness. However, as the boat ended up running over SpongeBob SquarePants, who was wandering around on the ocean surface, the resulting bump caused SMG4 to lose his balance, and the candy fell out of his hands and into Toad's mouth. Toad suddenly became hyperactive from the sugar and started spinning the boat out of control, flailing Mario in the air and making SMG4 even more seasick. They eventually stop after the sugar wore off and Toad fell asleep. SMG4 soon collapsed after due to his nausea and dizziness.
Mario then landed in the boat, now free from the life preserver. He tried to revive SMG4 and Toad with "CPR," which involved nothing more than slapping the two and humping them. Mario then tried to see if he could drive the boat by himself, but the steering wheel fell off the moment he touched it, and he decided to just throw it overboard. Looking around the boat to see if there was anything around to fix it with, Mario then got the idea to use the boat's engine as a substitute for the steering wheel. He yanked it out and started banging it into the control panel. SMG4 and Toad then woke up to find the boat on fire. Furious, they blamed the whole situation on Mario and start beating him up as punishment (thought Toad had a hard time hurting Mario due to his stubby arms).
Two hours later, the trio continued to float aimlessly around in the ocean, not knowing what to do. Mario's stomach suddenly growled, and he asked SMG4 if there was any food around. When the latter replied that their only option was to fish for food, Mario attempted to use Toad as bait by dunking him in the water. Toad retaliated, and the two of them got into a scuffle. They accidentally hit SMG4, prompting him to join the fight as well. While the three of them were distracted, a pirate ship suddenly sailed towards them in the distance and shot a cannonball at them. That caught the trio's attention, and the cannonball destroyed the boat, throwing them into the water.
Eventually, Mario, SMG4, and Toad woke up to find themselves being held captive by a Shy Guy pirate crew, who have tied them to a stake and were roasting them over a fire. Toad tried to free them by getting Mario to reach into his pocket for something useful; however, Mario tossed out Toad's cell phone and rifle in favor of eating his sandwich. Mario then tried to convince the Shy Guys to release them by singing, but they shut him up by threatening him with a sword.
Finally, SMG4 suggested that they just tried screaming as loud as they could, to which they did so. Their scream traveled in the form of sound waves across the ocean until they reached Fishy Boopkins, who was at home watching TV. Realizing that his friends were in trouble, Fishy ran to his "Boopkin-Mobile" (parodying the Batmobile) and headed off to rescue them. However, it took longer than expected, as Fishy Boopkins was concerned about speeding.
Meanwhile, the Shy Guys tried speeding up the cooking by using a flamethrower to strengthen the flames, which set Mario, SMG4, and Toad on fire. As the three of them panicked, Toad questioned why they have not been saved yet. It then cut back to Fishy, who has just made it out of the "Boopkins-Cave" (parodying the Batcave). Realizing that he was taking too long, he decided to summon other sea creatures to save his friends by using his "Boopkins Sonar." However, this proved to be ineffective, as the sea creatures that he sent were too small and weak to penetrate the pirate ship, to the point that the Shy Guys did not even notice what was going on.
Fishy Boopkins eventually made it to the pirate ship himself and jumped aboard to save his friends. However, it was revealed that he was too late, as Mario, SMG4, and Toad were all unconscious on the ground and still on fire. The Shy Guys prepared to attack Fishy, who tried to fight them off with "Fishy Kung-Fu"; although it merely involved him flailing about aimlessly. One Shy Guy slapped him, prompting him to start crying for his dad.
Mr. Boopkins suddenly emerged from the water, and Fishy asked his dad to take out the pirates for picking on him. Mr. Boopkins managed to smash the ship in one-hit, which sent everyone flying. He caught Fishy Boopkins, as well as Mario, SMG4, and Toad, who were all revealed to still be alive. The trio told Fishy Boopkins about how they were trying to find Didney Sea, and he asked his dad if he could go with them. Mr. Boopkins agreed, and he tossed them all in the air, where they eventually landed on the shore of the theme park. They happily ran towards Didney Sea, and the episode ends with a series of photographs depicting the fun they had on their vacation.
- Peach Toadstool
- Mickey Mouse
- SpongeBob SquarePants
- Cheep Cheeps
- Old Man Walker
- Nat Peterson
- Gary the Snail
- Gourmet Guy
- Minnie Mouse
- 00:08 – Gelato Beach, Super Mario Sunshine
- 00:33 – Silver Sparkle, Spongebob
- 00:44 – Let’s Go!, Mario Party 7
- 00:54 – Mother 3, Open Sesame!
- 01:12 – Adventure Awaits, Mario Party 7
- 01:16 – I’m On A Boat, Lonelyisland
- 01:28 – Cruise Choice, Mario Party 7
- 01:47 – Eight Player Rumble, Mario Party 7
- 02:10 – Super Starman Mario Remix, danielfazzino
- 02:32 – Optimism, Chrono Cross
- 03:21 – Thinking Music, Jeopardy
- 03:30 – Battle Theme, Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door
- 03:43 – Professor Frankly’s Theme, Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door
- 04:10 – Stealthy Conker, Conker’s Bad Fur Day (CBFD)
- 04:25 – Final Destination, Super Smash Bros Brawl
- 04:53 – Battle Canyon, Mario Party 1
- 05:30 – Victory Theme, Final Fantasy I
- 05:40 – This Is Gospel, Panic! At The Disco
- 05:50 – Athletic, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island
- 05:57 – Red Bread, Team Fortress 2
- 06:09 – Main Theme, Batman (Adam West)
- 07:16 – Battle Fanfare, Paper Mario
- 07:31 – Samurai Slice 2, Rhythm Heaven Fever
- 07:46 – Daytime Drama, Spongebob
- 07:52 – Rococo Rondo, Spongebob
- 08:05 – Puzzle Plank Galaxy, Super Mario Galaxy
- 08:35 – Onett, Super Smash Bros Brawl
- R64: Mario's Road Trip: Just like how the trio were on a vacation to Didney Land, this episode also features the trio heading to Didney Sea.
- SM64 Christmas 2015 - Christmas Crazies: A flashback to that episode happens near the start of the episode.
- Super Mario 64: Meet the Toad: Toad's sugar addiction from that episode is also shown here.
- R64: Stupid Mario Kart - Joe Boopkins makes a return in this episode.
- This video is the final official video in the Retarded64 series. On June 12, 2017, SMG4 formally announced that due to YouTube's video policy, Retarded64 would be discontinued. However Mario's Train Trip and SMG4: Freddy's Ultimate Custom Spaghetteria could both be Retarded64 episodes considering that they are in the R64 playlist.
- This is also the only Retarded64 episode to include the Glitchy Boy logo during the intro, along with Stupid Mario Sunshine.
- The name of Didney Sea might have been from Tokyo DisneySea, the second theme park to open at Tokyo Disney Resort.
- The "Boopkins-Mobile" uses the same model of the Batmobile from Batman: Arkham Asylum.
- This episode reveals that SMG4 was traumatized from the events of Christmas Crazies, and as a result, he doesn't trust airplanes anymore.