R64: Mario Goes Shopping is the thirty-eighth episode of Season 3 and the one hundred and thirty-seventh overall to be uploaded by SMG4.
This is also the pilot episode of the Retarded64 series. It was aired on August 4, 2013.
The video begins with Guy and Little Billy, with the former telling the latter how he could get himself killed or seriously injured playing on the street just to get run over by a speeding Mario en route to Walmart, much to Little Billy's confusion.
Turns out that Mario was told 5 minutes earlier by Princess Peach to buy her some items, which annoyed him since she interrupted his derp-eyes time. Much to his dismay, he had to do it lest he faced her wrath.
The first thing he needed to buy was a cake mix. He looked around and saw one. Happy, he took it just to realize it was actually detergent. Angry, he kicked it up so high that when it landed on Enzo, it knocked him out. When he turned around to search for another bag, he saw MCGustavo announce that he took the last cake mix in the store. Not wanting to be outbought of it, Mario activated a Bob-omb but since MCGustavo was nowhere to be found, he quickly had to leave the Bob-omb somewhere and settled on putting it in Tagen supermariobrosfan's shopping cart quickly and hiding to avoid being blown up.
As he searched for the cake mix, he saw MCGustavo at the cashier so Mario flew over. However, it turned out that there was a line. Mario suddenly had another idea. He made FightingMario54321 drop his beans. It worked and in a rage, FightingMario54321 attacked Weegee, who had no idea what happened. With the commotion in the back, MCGustavo was shocked as he looked on. Taking advantage of the situation, Mario took the paid cake mix while everyone else was distracted.
The next item Mario had to buy was a princess dress. Heading into a 7-11 store, he asked the cashier, Spilight756, if he had any princess dresses for sale. He did and then asked who it was for. Mario pondered for a while before declaring that it was his to wear. Coming out in it, he said he didn't look bad.
The third item Mario needed to buy was a pinch of magic. Mario tried to run over an old wizard to get it, but he complained it wasn't working.
Next up on the shopping list was a new pair of sparkly shoes. After buying them, Mario came across Bowser in an elevator. When Mario asked when he got from the shoe store, Bowser replied that he got a pair of flip flops. Mario, in turn, declared in a swag manner that he had gotten sparkly shoes.
The fifth item Mario needed was some furniture for the castle. Entering an Ikea store, he wondered what furniture she would like to have. He tried to remember but the one memory he had was when he and Peach were on the rooftop having a date and all he said was: "I LIEK TURTLES!" Somehow, that gave him an idea to buy a log. When the cashier, Dreth, asked for payment, Mario quickly trashed the place since he was out of cash.
The sixth item Peach wanted was some female underwear. As he went on, he was stopped by a policeman who wondered what he was doing with said underwear. Mario promised he was only sniffing them.
The seventh and last item was some food which excluded spaghetti much to Mario's chagrin. Looking around, he saw a food store about to close. He couldn't let that happen, so he drove into the shop and asked for spaghetti, just to realize he had accidentally run over the store owner, FireMario126.
Now finished with his shopping, Mario returned with his goods (including the log that he somehow forgot getting). He then drove back to the castle, running over the guy who was just resuming his lecturing of being safe with Billy again.
Back in the castle, Peach was grateful for Mario buying her items. Just as she declared she had something special for him, she declared it was more shopping for jewelry. Mario had enough, so he tied her to his kart and let it drive far away from the castle.
- Guy and Little Billy
- Old Man Hobo
- Mario's To Do List: This episode is the reason why when Peach made Mario go do some items, she got his card blacklisted from buying spaghetti.