R64: Mario the Olympian is a blooper by SMG4 and the 19th installment of the Retarded64 series. It involves Mario competing in some sort of Olympic competition to win food. As the name suggests, it was created to commemorate the end of the 2016 Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.
After Sonic passed out due to Mario's usual retardness, Mario sneaked inside the Olympic Stadium using Sonic's Olympic license and competes for the gold medal (not that he cares), and hopefully for him, free food.
Mario standing on the side of the road after crashing his go-kart, waiting for Sonic the Hedgehog to pick him up. When Sonic arrives, Mario begins dancing naked in the passenger seat, much to Sonic's horror. Mario notices Sonic's Olympic Games license which promises food, prompting him to summon Frankie onto the RV. This causes Sonic to crash the RV and end up in a daze. Mario drives to the stadium and uses an unconscious Sonic to gain access to the premises, running over the announcer in the process.
Dumbledore serves as the referee for the competition and explains the rules to the competitors, consisting of Mario, Frankie, Old Man Hobo, Woody, and Kermit The Frog. Dumbledore states that whoever wins will receive an unlimited reward of their choosing, much to Mario's enthusiasm.
The first event is a race to the finish line, which Mario wins by riding on Sonic's back at light speed. Next up is the pole vault, which culminates in everyone launching into space. After that is a wrestling match with Mario facing off against Woody. Mario threatens Woody, who responds by using a flamethrower and chainsaw to attack the plumber. Mario dispatches Woody and is faced with defeating Old Man Hobo, who fires a laser beam at him. This backfires as Mario breathes the flames out, incinerating Old Man Hobo and Frankie. As Mario celebrates, he receives a call from Kermit, who wishes death upon him and threatens to stick his finger up Mario's rear. The two engage in a scuffle which ends with them exploding.
Afterwards is the gymnastics portion of the competition, which involves Mario leaping and flopping face first onto the floor, Frankie failing at a triple jump, Old Man Hobo launching through a window, and Woody posing in the air before landing on his crotch, much to the referee's humor. The penultimate event is a shooting match, where Mario grows tired of the games and leaves, but not before shooting Dumbledore. Dumbledore orders the other competitors to apprehend Mario or else nobody will win anything, with Kermit saying that everyone will get rid of Mario.
Final Event: Shoot The Mario!
As the name suggests, the final event sees Mario escaping from his opponents on a motorcycle, with Woody jumpscaring him and causing Mario to flee to the gym. There, he and Frankie engage in a tennis match with a Bob-omb, with Mario ultimately defeating his opponent. Unfortunately, Mario is struck down by a wheelchair-bound Kermit and Dumbledore sentences him to an entire decade in prison, to which Mario rejoices, due to the thought of free food.
- Albus Dumbledore
- Old Man Hobo
- Kermit The Frog
- The Police
- Angry Indian Guy
- Crazy Raisin Lady
- Gourmet Guy
- Burning soldier puts into the cauldron after Mario ran over him.
- This is the second video based on the Olympic Games, after Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Mario at the Olympic Games.
- This video was created to commemorate the end of the 2016 Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro, as it is in the previous video, where it celebrates the 2012 Olympic Games in London.