R64: Princess Capturing Simulator. is the twentieth episode of Season 5 and the two hundred and thirty-second overall to be uploaded by SMG4.
This is also the thirteenth episode of the Retarded64 series and the first R64 episode to use the new R64 intro made by KingAsylus91. It was aired on June 29th, 2015.
The title screen appears, showing Bowser with Princess Peach locked in his clown car. As the Start button is pressed, Bowser flies off but crashes into the screen.
It then starts off with Bowser sleeping, but then wakes up due to his cuckoo clock. The Narrator then greets Bowser to the game where he "get to be a creep and steals little girls". Bowser then walks outside and begins his plan to steal the princess.
However, before he could do so, he is stopped by a Bob-omb Buddy who reported that his army is starving and being unpaid. Bowser naturally did not care and pushed him out of the way.
Bullet Bill Backfires
Once Bowser reached the castle, his first action is to play a crane minigame in an attempt to capture Peach. As Mario is happily reporting that Peach had not been kidnapped for a while to SMG4, Bowser captured her and was promoted to that of a douchebag.
As Bowser threw Peach at Bowser Jr. who wanted her as his mom, he started dancing just for his Mario alarm to go off. Turns out Mario (who was EXTREMELY pissed) is after him, causing Bowser to have the idea of firing off a giant Bullet Bill at him. All the explosion did was to blast him off to where Bowser's lair is. Unknown to what is going to befall him, Bowser resumed celebrating, allowing Peach to return home and for Bowser to scream and be subsequently thrown up into the air before exploding, giving him a Game Over.
One respawn later, Bowser decided to just go right up to the castle and request for the Princess. Toad is actually cool with the idea but requested 85 dollars, causing Bowser to just rush in and get her before retreating back to his castle, much to Mario's dismay.
Back in his lair, Bowser attempted to get Peach to love him. He started by giving her flowers which worked. He then sang which also worked at first but then he coughed, causing her thoughts on him to drop. In a last-ditch attempt to like him, Bowser pressed a Peach-related emergency button which played a video where it had him doing things to his Peach doll, causing her to hate him now by kicking him in his groin. Bowser naturally screamed in pain.
Just then, RMKP showed up outside Bowser's lair. Thinking quickly, Bowser went outside taking out the mustache and hat from his Mario alarm. As Mario, Bowser talked it out with the two officers where neither of them suspected a thing. Meanwhile, inside his lair, Bowser Jr. is interacting with Peach but as she would not respond, he flung the Pingas Clock at her. As she is about to get up, the clock struck her, bouncing off to near Bowser. Just as they are about to go, Bowser's Pingas clock went off, causing the officers to shoot him, giving him a Game Over.
After respawning again, Bowser rushed out and grabbed the sleeping Princess but not before having Kamek act as a decoy in her place. Suddenly, a Chain Chomp appeared to chase out Bowser, much to Kamek's amusement.
Suddenly, Mario entered the room asking about Peach. As he saw Kamek, he got a little suspicious about her new look. Kamek tried to act in-character before deciding to just cast a spell to blow up Mario, just to blow himself up. Mario, now angry, went after Bowser.
As Bowser danced through Bob-omb Battlefield, several of his troops demanded that they form a better plan to defeat Mario. Bowser, giving in, decided to ask what would be their plan. However, he then decides to ditch their plans for his own. He started by adding in many Goombas, which Mario later drops by and burnt all of them alive with a flamethrower.
Bowser then tried in Tiny-Huge Island to have an army of Koopa Troopas to stop Mario but they all chased him down to their death when they forgot about a bridge.
Bowser, thinking all of his troops are useless, resorted to one last thing: to cheat. After inserting the toobigpingas2222 cheat code the secret troops were unlocked. Bowser then placed laser guns in Big Boo's Haunt which killed Mario offscreen, many Teletubbies ambushing Mario with rocket launchers after he came out of the toilet, blasting him into pieces, and having many Toads in the main hall of the castle. Just as Mario is getting angry from seeing many Toads, Bowser activated a trap: A Justin Bieber magazine being fired at Mario. They all swarmed over him and probably killed him offscreen.
Mario has had enough and teleported to where Bowser was dancing with Banana Joe. Bowser, instead of attacking him, taunted him and instantly got killed by Mario shooting at him, giving him a Game Over and a message that says that cheating is bad.
Bowser's Ultimate Last Plan
Bowser did not give up and rode his ship to steal the princess first, then pushed Mario off a cliff who did not realize he was about to die. Bowser finally killed Mario, but the princess was revealed to be a fake. Meanwhile, Peach was going outside but died when she fell off a bridge. Bowser, having enough, decides to smoke the shrooms, causing his head to shrink and for him to fly into the sky. The video ends with Bowser still sleeping in his bed tripping out from smoking the shrooms.
- Chain Chomp
- Toast Guy
- Koopa Troopa
- Justin Bieber
- Eggbot 2000
|Can I sing a song for you?|
|This music list is incomplete and needs to be completed. Any user is obliged to do so.|
- 0:04 - Super Mario 3D World - Bowser Land MIDI
- 0:10 - Swiggity Swooty (I'm Coming For That Booty) - YaBoyJDub
- 0:23 -
- 0:34 -
- 0:47 - Bytch Do It Look Like I Care - RahtyRose
- 0:50 -
- 0:56 -
- 1:16 - Ridin' - Chamillionaire ft. Krayzie Bone
- 1:22 - Main Theme - from GTA San Andreas OST
- 1:26 - Bowser's Theme - Mario Party 1 (also Star Catch Fanfare from Mario 64 plays at the same time)
- 1:37 -
- 1:56 - Trololo Song
- 2:30 - Game Over Yeah! - Sega Rally Championship
- 2:40 - Bowser's Theme - from Super Mario 64 OST
- 2:45 - Milk Bar - The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
- 3:02 - Princess in Distress - from Paper Mario OST
- 3:14 -
- 3:31 - Let's Get It On - Marvin Gaye
- 3:33 - Sad Girl - from Super Mario Galaxy OST
- 3:41 - Oh Yeah - Yello
- 3:55 -
- 4:00 -
- 4:30 -
- 4:45 - Indiana Jones Theme - John Williams
- 5:06 -
- 5:17 - Main Theme from Super Mario 64
- 5:33 - Jeopardy Theme
- 5:46 - Chacarron - El Chombo
- 5:56 - Overworld theme - Super Mario 3D Land
- 6:34 - Keepin' on the Path - Mario Party 2
- 7:01 - Cuban Pete - Jim Carrey
- 7:14 -
- 7:22 - Into the Cosmos - from Metal Slug 3 OST
- 7:39 - Victory - from Final Fantasy I OST
- 8:11 - Easy - Commodores
- 8:27 -
- This is the first R64 episode to have been made only four weeks after the previous one.
- This video introduces a new R64 intro made by KingAsylus91. It's the third R64 blooper to use a different intro than the other ones, the first being R64: Son of a bowser. and the second being R64: the Toad, the Fat and the Ugly..
- Bowser flying at the end to Easy Like Sunday Morning references Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Super Happy Magical Fun Fun Island.
- Bowser can rank up to two different ranks: Douchebag (After kidnapping the princess for the first time) and Retarded Murderer (After killing Mario).
- The video's description says *Adult language and uhh weird stuff. not suitable for anyone under 50*. This is a reference to (and a slightly modified version of) the opening quote for R64: Return to Freddy's Spaghettria.
- The "Troop Editor" may be a reference to Super Mario Maker with similar functions.
- The "Peach happiness" meter uses the same image used for the Swag Meter and the Hunger Meter, with the former one having appeared on several previous SMG4 Videos.
- It appears that having a PINGAS is illegal since the police shot Bowser because of the fact he had a PINGAS alarm clock.
- The cheat codes acts more like a password rather than an actual cheat code, even though it could still be cheating because none of the secret troops were from the Mario games except for the Toad troops.
- The English subtitles feature commentary from Foxy the Scout (FC), jaxon6062 (JC), [nova] (NC), Kyooshi (KC), Damon English (DE) and 'AK'.
- Oddly a Bob-omb Buddy appears on Bowser's army, despite them being good guys.
- This is the first time Bowser did his shrunken face look.