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LOOKS LIKE IT'S SWEEPIN' TIME!! |
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This is SMG4: If Mario Was In... Poppy Playtime's official transcript.
Video[]
[Black Friday Sale Advertisement]
Luke as the King Chonk: Hey guys it's me, SMG4!! ^^
(...)
Luke: What? WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?! Anyway, there's a special Black Friday Sale happening right now, and you can get the brand new King Chonk Plush, that's me!! And up to 40% off all other items! And it includes any GLITCH merch. Like Murder Drones too! But be quick, the sale lasts only 3 days left, or 3 days only. I don't know what to say. I'm an- I'm just a plush, I don't know anything. Get it now over on smg4.store! Now, onto the video!! (He accidentally flings the chonk at the back of him)
(WUOOAA)
(Luke disappears)
[SMG4 Intro]
(A guy walks up in front of the screen)
Guy: You are about to see the most incredible doll ever invented. Her name is Poppy. And she is the first truly intelligent doll in the world. A little girl talks to her, Poppy gives her answer.
Kid: I love you!
Poppy: Maan, shut yo bitchass up!
Luigi: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! (Sound Effect)
(Luigi walks directly to the television)
Luigi: Wouldn't we be best friends Poppy?
Poppy: I'm a real girl! Just like you~
Luigi: OOOHHH! (Sound Effect)
(Mario is trying to fix a toy hole)
Mario: This is the hardest thing in the world. (Sound Effect)
Luigi: MARIOOOOOO!!
Mario: What?!
Luigi: CAN YOU COME WITH ME TO GET THAT POPPY DOLL!
Mario: What? Hell no. Cant you see I'm doing some important business right now?
(Luigi has a new If Mario was in in his hand)
Luigi: Leeeeet'saaagoooooo!
Mario: Wait.. is that NOOOOOOOOOOO STOP
[If Mario was in... Poppy Playtime]
Mario: Ah crap...
(Mario doesn't want to be in the toy factory)
Luigi: YIPEE!!! TIME TO GET MY DOLL!!! Hello?
Mario: Welp no ones here Luigi, can we go home?
???: Hey folks
Mario and Luigi: Hm?
Cave: its me cave johnson, head of the the company Poopy time The best innovators of toys in the world if you look onscreen we are constantly working hard to make the next greatest thing in toy technology for your kids!
Mario: Oooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhh (Sound Effect)
Cave Unfortunately, it seems like you're trespassing right now. So it looks like were gonna have to kill you... haha just joking! What is this Five Nights at Freddy's?
(Huggy takes Luigi)
Cave: But seriously though, piss off.
(The TV turns off)
Mario: Welp you heard the man lets go piss- Luigi? LUIIGIIIIIII!!!!!! MAMAF*CKER!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario was walking until he saw a mysterious door with a color code)
(Mario messes around with the color buttons)
Door (As Lucio): Oh yeah, one more thing: (Shoots Mario)
Mario: Aw man, what the hell is the password!?
(Thomas the Tank Engine passes by)
Mario: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm........ I got it!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario gets Thomas and makes him crash though the door)
(Meanwhile, William Afton is casually watching Toy Chica posing)
William: Call me Purple Guy 'cause I'm gonna put a child in that animatronic-
(Thomas crashes onto William Afton)
Mario: Haha! (Jumps off Thomas) (Sound Effect)
Mario: Hm? (Sound Effect)
(Mario finds a Hand Kit and equips it)
Mario: OOOo is this a back scratcher???
(Mario grabs an old TV and hits it to his face)
Mario: BEHOLD! MY "I DONT CAREINATOR!"
Purple Guy: Heyyy...you're not allowed in her-
Mario: I don't care.
(Mario slaps William Afton with his so-called I Don't Careinator)
(Mario realizes...)
Telephone: Hello... hello, hello! uhhh.. I wanted to record a-
Mario: Shut the f*ck up! :D (Sound Effect)
(Mario throws the telephone)
Scout: Let's go!
(Mario tries to do a high-five with Scout, only to hit him and he gets flung away)
Peach: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(Mario grabs a Pikachu and electrifies Peach)
Mario: Oohohoho!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario uses his I Don't Careinator to touch Wario's ass)
Wario: Ohhh yeahh!!~
Mario: Oohhhh~ (Sound Effect)
(Mario is asleep while his I Dont Careinator cooks his food for him)
(Mario grabs Jub Jub)
Jub Jub: Jub..Jub... Jubjub!! Jubjub!! (He asks Mario to get his basket ball down from the tree)
Mario: Okie dokie! KICK THE BABY! (Sound Effect)
YEET!
[It's out of the Park!]
(Mario keeps slapping William)
William: AHH HELP! AAAAAAAAHHH-
Luigi: MARIO!!! HEEEELP!
Mario: Hm? (Sound Effect)
Mario: Oh yeah thats right i was helping Luigi
(Mario tries walking at the toystore and looks behind him, only to find out Huggy Wuggy is behind him)
Mario: WHAT THE F*CK IS THAT?! (Sound Effect)
Cave: Meet Huggy Wuggy...
Cave: ...isn't she a beauty? We modelled it after my ex-wife.
Mario: AWWW, DO YOU WANT A HUG LITTLE GUY?
(Mario hits Huggy Wuggy's face, and disrespectfully laughs at him while grabbing each of Huggy's hands with the I Don't Careinator)
Mario: HELLO ITS A ME, TALL-ASS CLOWN
Mario: Women stay away from me cause im so godamn lanky
Mario: But that's ok cause I got my best friend! My right hand!
(Mario drops Huggy Wuggy)
Mario: Hahaha, stupid blue Muppet
(Mario doesn't notice he's in trouble)
(Mario walks into an electronic room)
Mario: Ooooh! (Sound Effect)
(Mario hears something at this back)
[NEED POWER]
[GIVE ME ELECTRICITY YOU DUMBASS]
(Mario tries to think as hard as he can)
(Mario's brain jumps out of his head and hits him.)
Mario's Brain: Ya frickin' jackass. (Jumps back into Mario's head)
Mario: I got it! (Sound Effect)
(Mario pulls the TV using his I Dont Careinator)
(Mario tries pulling it again and fails. He tries reaching the electric machine, but it's too far away)
(Mario tries reaching it with his nose and gets electrocuted)
(After giving electricity to the TV, Mario gets dizzy)
[POOPY TIME™]
Cave: Before you go home, make yourself a free toy with our magic toy machine, just describe what you want!
Cave: (Fast) [Poopytime is not responsible for choking, stabbing, hazards or death resulting from this toys.]
(Mario is amazed)
(Mario types various keys on the keyboard)
Cave: Wow, thanks for describing your friend, is this information correct?
[UGLY AF, SHORT, MAKES ME WANT TO DIE, STINKS, KILLS MY BONER, UNBEARABLE, I HATE IT, PLS KILL IT, TERRIBLE, STUPID, SUCKS, KILL ME]
(Mario wheezes)
(A bad-looking Mario toy gets released out of a pipe)
Mario Doll: It'sa me, Mario!
(Mario Realizes²)
Mario: AAAAAAAAAAAH (Sound Effect)
Mario: AWWW HELLL NAWH!! (Throws directly to the door) (Sound Effect)
(The door scans the ugly Mario doll and opens up)
(Mario tries to throw the doll into oblivion)
Ugly Mario Doll: Do you want to be friends?
Mario: F*ck You! (Sound Effect)
(As soon as Mario was about to throw the doll, Huggy Wuggy appears)
(That moment when)
Mario: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Sound Effect)
(Mario hits Huggy Wuggy with the ugly Mario doll)
(Huggy Wuggy grabs Mario)
Huggy Wuggy: GRASSY AAAAASS
Mario: WAAAAAAAAAAA!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario chokes Huggy Wuggy)
(And he eventually takes off the hand)
Huggy Wuggy: Ooooooooooohhhhhh!!!
Huggy Wuggy: you're gonna make me act up
Mario: AAAH!! (Unintelligible)
(Mario hits Huggy Wuggy with his I Dont Careinator several times)
(Mario falls from its hands)
(Huggy Wuggy gets angrier)
Mario: AAAAHH!!
(Mario runs away and goes directly to the keyboard to create more ugly Mario dolls)
Mario: BACK OFF YA SPOOKY BITCH! (Sound Effect)
(The ugly Mario dolls go directly into Huggy Wuggy's mouth)
(Huggy Wuggy falls and Mario ground pounds on the ugly Mario dolls)
(The ugly Mario dolls speak and makes Mario fall onto the ground)
(Mario giggles)
(Huggy Wuggy spits out all the Mario dolls and is very angry)
Huggy Wuggy: I'M SICK OF YOUR SHIT!
(Mario realizes that he's in big trouble until noticing a vent)
Mario: さよなら* STINKY! [*Sayonara]
(Mario escapes and jumps right into the vent)
Huggy Wuggy: Oh, OH! BITCH'S KINDA SUS, HE JUST VENTEEED!
(Mario tries running away from Huggy Wuggy in the vent)
Mario: RUUN BITCH, RUUUUUUUUN!!!!! (Sound Effect)
Huggy Wuggy: Hello there.
Mario: AAAHH!! (Sound Effect)
Huggy Wuggy: Spooky Month! Spooky Month! Spooky Month! (Does the Spooky Dance)
Mario: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario tries look at another side, only to find Huggy Wuggy for the third time with a tea set)
Huggy Wuggy: 'Ello Gov'nuh!
(Mario is pissed)
(Mario kicks the vent fan, blowing Huggy away)
Mario: Game over! (Sound Effect)
(Mario disappears)
Huggy Wuggy: OH HELL NAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!
(Huggy Wuggy tries to find Mario. In the vent, he sees a similar silhouette of Mario, only to see it was an ugly Mario doll)
Ugly Mario Doll: HEY STINKY
Ugly Mario Doll: SUCK MY ASS
Huggy Wuggy: ARE YOU PULLIN' MY DICK BRO?
(Mario falls into a metal bridge and tries to figure out a way to block the vent)
(Mario spots some boxes and tries grabbing them)
(Huggy Wuggy falls from the vent)
Huggy Wuggy: Man, it's getting hot in here.
(Before Huggy Wuggy even attacked him, Mario has grabbed the boxes and pushed Huggy Wuggy off)
Huggy Wuggy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHH
Mario: Haha! (Throws his I Dont Careinator) Take-a that, you big monkey! (Sound Effect)
(Mario celebrates until Huggy Wuggy stands behind him)
(Mario looks behind himself)
Mario: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! AAAH!! OH MY GOOOD!! AAAHHH!! (Sound Effect)
(Huggy Wuggy grabs him and everything turns black)
(Mario opens his eyes only to realize that Huggy Wuggy wanted to become his friend)
Huggy Wuggy: I love you, you love-
Mario: W-what? you just want to be my friend?
Huggy Wuggy: Hell yeah :)
Mario: Ehhh, Marios friends are usually ugly anyway.
Mario: SURE!
(Huggy Wuggy cheers and places Mario on its head)
Mario: Do you know where Poppy is? I think my brother might be with her
Huggy Wuggy: Yes I do!
Huggy Wuggy: Over there! (Points to the flower room)
Mario: Oo, nice place you got here!
(Huggy Wuggy and Mario leap into the door, only for Mario to lose consciousness as soon as they hit it)
(Mario wakes up)
Mario: Oohho..
Mario: Mama mia...
Mario: (Gets shocked) WOAH!
(Mario sees Luigi looking at the Poppy Doll)
Mario: LUIGI! THERE YOU ARE!
Luigi: Mario, look! It's the last Poppy doll!
(Luigi opens the glass closet and grabs the Poppy doll)
Poppy Doll: Luigi, Luigi! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
Luigi: YAAAY! I GOT THE POPPY DOOLLLL!!!
(Luigi celebrates)
Poppy Doll: You opened my case...
(While Luigi was hugging the doll, The Doll transported him to hell)
Mario: LUIGI, NOOOO!!!!!!!! (Sound Effect)
(Mario didn't catch his brother and sobs)
Mario: Luigi..! (Sound Effect)
Luigi: Mario!
Mario: WAT (Sound Effect)
Luigi: This doll can teleport us to hell!
Luigi: Er I mean, Papa Johns!
Papa John: You're welcome to my store anytime.
Mario: ......
Mario: Looks like its another day in the life of Mario.
(The audience laughs)
[Created by a deranged man. Aka. SMG4]
[Written with tears]
[Produced by Fishy Boopkins]
[Actors] [Mario - Chris Pratt] [Huggy Wuggy = Slenderman] [Luigi - Charlie Day]
[Wario - Elon Musk] [Jubjub - soccer ball] [Purple guy - random hobo]
[No one was hurt in the making of the video...]
[...except Purple Guy, screw him]
[King Chonk Advertisement Segment 2]
King Chonk/Luke: Hey guys it's me, The talking plush from before!
King Chonk/Luke: Just a reminder that there's a black friday sale happening right now!
King Chonk/Luke: Get the King Chonk on sale, and up to 40% off all other items on the GLITCH store!
King Chonk/Luke: But be quick, the sale lasts only for another 3 days.
King Chonk/Luke: You can check all of this out at smg4.store.
King Chonk/Luke: Again, thank you guys so much for watching, and I'll see you guys next time! Bye bye!!
[SMG4 Outro]