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This page is the transcript for SMG4: Officer Meggy.
Note: Any grammar errors made in the script when the characters are talking are because of grammatical errors in the video itself.
Transcript[]
Inside the Police Station[]
(The video starts off at a police station located in Aubergine with Meggy Spletzer and Mr. Hall Monitor inside)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Let me out! I'm innocent i swear!
Meggy: Yeah yeah save it for the judge
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Gets angry at Meggy as the entire screen turns red)
Meggy: (In shock)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Has a happy expression) Not bad Meggy! If you weren't so short, you'd actually be intimidating.
Meggy: (Gets annoyed from being called short)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Leaves the jail cell) How was it?
Meggy: That was pretty fun hehe!
Mr. Hall Monitor: I'm so glad you decided to come to see what its like being an...
Mr. Hall Monitor: ENFORCER OF JUSTICE
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Looks over at Wario and Waluigi's jail cell)
Wario: (Laughs) Hehe. You're not even a rookie yet. Don't get too comfortable!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Stares intently at Wario right in his face)
Wario: (Freaking out) WAIT! WAIT! I TAKE IT BACK!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Presses a NUT button from outside the cell)
(A monitor then appears, showing a video of a kawaii Mario dancing to the song Mio Honda's Step!)
Wario: AHH IT BURNS! (Screams loudly)
Waluigi: (Looks over at the video, then also screams loudly)
(Both Wario and Waluigi's heads then get set on fire)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Staring intently at Wario and Waluigi, then has a happy expression on his face while looking towards Meggy)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Now, why don't you come with me Meggy. I got something I wanna show you (Runs towards the exit door)
Meggy: (Walks towards the exit, but then looks inside of Wario and Waluigi's jail cell, as Wario and Waluigi are on fire laying on the ground)
Meggy: Isnt punishing prisoners like this illegal?
Mr. Hall Monitor: Nothings illegal when you're on the side of justice!
Meggy: (Raises arms up) Cool! (Walks outside with Mr. Hall Monitor)
Outside the Police Station[]
(The scene starts off with Mr. Hall Monitor talking to Meggy while he is standing on top of a cop car)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Welcome to the
Mr. Hall Monitor: JUSTICE ENFORCEMENT MOBILE
(Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor then proceed to sit down inside the cop car)
Meggy: Woah!!! I've always wanted to be in one of these!
Mr. Hall Monitor: Look in the glove box
Meggy: (Opens the glove box, pulling out a police uniform for her)
Meggy: OH MY GOSH!
Meggy: IS THIS- IS THIS-
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Pulls out a walkie talkie) That's right!
Mr. Hall Monitor: You're my partner in crime for this ride!
Meggy: OH MY GODDDDDD...!!! (Her screaming ends up shattering a window to the police station, a window to the cop car, and Mr. Hall Monitor's monitor screen)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Gives Meggy a thumbs up)
Meggy's Training / Patrolling Through the City[]
(This scene starts off with Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor on patrol, showing the cop car at various angles, before showing the inside of the vehicle, revealing Meggy in her police uniform as Mr. Hall Monitor drives)
Mr. Hall Monitor: So on these justice enforcing patrols, Its very important we watch out for anything...
Mr. Hall Monitor: ILLEGAL
Meggy: (Writing down what he says on a notepad) I see I see!
(The cop car then stops in front of Mario, who is drinking soda from a can)
Mario: (Looks around) Aw man! no bin? Oh well
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Turns to stare intently at Mario)
(A back and forth then occurs, where when Mario tries to place down his can on the ground, Mr. Hall Monitor's gun goes closer to his head, but when Mario lifts up the can, the gun gets farther away from his head. This goes back and forth before Mario screams and freaks out)
Mario: Fine! Mama f**ker!
Meggy: (Writing down notes based on what Mr. Hall Monitor did)
(The next scene shows a visible sign in front of a river saying NO FEEDING THE DUCKS, which Tari ignores by throwing a loaf of bread at the Animal Crossing villager Bill. It is also shown that Scoot also has a piece of bread in it's mouth, implying that Tari fed them too)
Bill and Scoot: (Quacking while swimming away with bread in their mouth)
Tari: (Laughing while waving, but then gets shocked to see Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor emerging from the water)
Tari: (Screams and runs away)
(The next scene shows SMG4 emerging from an alleyway, wanting to buy memes from Bob Bobowski)
SMG4: (Looks around, then walks towards Bob)
Bob: (Shows SMG4 a bunch of memes that he has)
SMG4: Mmhmmm.. (Reveals a handful of money)
Bob: (Nods, then is crushed by Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor's cop car)
SMG4: (Screams)
Meggy: (Jumps towards SMG4, which makes him fall on the ground)
(The next scene shows Meggy about to eat a donut, but Mr. Hall Monitor having a tough time trying to eat the donut because his face is only a monitor, so he ends up just mashing the donut against his monitor multiple times)
(The next scene then shows Old Man Hobo about to cross the street, which he clearly needs help crossing)
Meggy: (Grabs her walkie talkie and puts it to her ear) An elder needs help crossing!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Nods with a happy expression, only to pick up Old Man Hobo and throw him over 5,800 km into space)
A NEW RECORD!! (Success!)
After Meggy's Training is Completed[]
(The scene starts with Mr. Hall Monitor still driving, and Meggy sitting in the seat next to him)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Stares intently at a group of Shy Guys, along with the Shy Guy Leader, then continues driving as normal)
Meggy: (Looks at Mr. Hall Monitor) Wha..What was that?
Mr. Hall Monitor: Huh?
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Has a happy expression again) Oh, dont worry about that. Some other business I'm dealing with
Mr. Hall Monitor's Wife and Kids Scene[]
(The car then stops at the Appliances store, with Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor exiting the car)
Meggy: Where are we Mr Monitor?
Mr. Hall Monitor: just popping by to say hi to the wife and kids
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Walks over to the window, and presses his face against it)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Hey honey, how are you and junior doing?
(It is now revealed that Mr. Hall Monitor's wife and kids are a microwave and a toaster, who remain silent because they cannot speak)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Oh really? All A's? I'm so proud of you junior! Ill tell Mrs Magnus shes doing a good job.
Toaster: (Silence)
Meggy: Uhh i'll wait in the car... (Sits back in the cop car)
Police walkie talkie: ATTENTION DISPATCH N WE HAVE A 10-42, I REPEAT WE HAVE A 10-42, OVER.
Meggy: (Looks in shock at Mr. Hall Monitor, because he just appeared out of no where after the message)
Mr. Hall Monitor: This is Officer Hal Monitor, Badge Number 010245 taking the call, over.
Police walkie talkie: Roger that! thank you, over.
Meggy: (Looking at Mr. Hall Monitor) What does that mean?
Mr. Hall Monitor: (With sunglasses on) It means sh*t just got real (Drives aggressively around the corner with the siren on)
(A transition happens with Mr. Hall Monitor's head in the middle of the screen, with the background twirling in a circle. This is a nod to the old Batman transitions)
The Shy Guy Incident[]
(The scene starts off with Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor looking over a brick wall at the group of Shy Guys, with Mr. Hall Monitor using binoculars)
Meggy: C-can you tell me whats going on? Do I need to arm myself?
Mr. Hall Monitor: Just watch. I've been tracking these guys for months now.
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Watches two shy guys having a completely normal conversation)
Yellow Shy Guy: Hello!
Green Shy Guy: Hello!
Yellow Shy Guy: How are you?
Green Shy Guy: Oh oh oh good!
Yellow Shy Guy: Okay, cool!
Green Shy Guy: Yes! Yup, mhm!
Yellow Shy Guy: I-I love this topic..
Green Shy Guy: Yup!
Yellow Shy Guy: ...normal conversation.
Green Shy Guy: Yup! Of course!
Yellow Shy Guy: Not suspicious.
Green Shy Guy: Yes, correct!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Looks around, then looks at the Leader Shy Guy opening the door, which makes a Light Blue Shy Guy fall on the ground and say oof)
Leader Shy Guy: (Looks around, then whistles, and backs up)
Yellow and Red Shy Guys: (Carrying a crate, and walking towards the back of the truck, which they then jump inside of)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Puts down binoculars, looks at Meggy, and pulls out a gun)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Meggy, i'm going to need you to take this and be my backup.
Meggy: (Looks at the gun, then back at Mr. Hall Monitor) OK!
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (Sits in the cop car, which then drives towards the Shy Guy's group)
Light Blue and Red Shy Guys: (Trying to place a crate into the back of the truck) Put that sh*t in! Get it in!
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (Jumps out of the cop car, holding their guns)
Mr. Hall Monitor: HANDS UP! YOURE ALL UNDER ARREST FOR ILLEGAL HUMAN TRAFFICKING.
Shy Guy Group: (Hands in the air) OH SH*T!!
Leader Shy Guy: (Laughs)
Meggy: (Points her gun at the Leader Shy Guy) HEY! HE SAID PUT YOUR HANDS UP!
Leader Shy Guy: (Throws a Bob-omb at Meggy) BEGONE THOT!!
Bob-omb: EXPLODEEE... (Hurling towards Meggy)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Covers Meggy from the explosion)
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (They notice that the truck is driving away, so they exchange looks, and drive after the truck)
The High Speed Chase[]
Leader Shy Guy: (Hears the cop car's siren) What the sh*t?!
Meggy: Pull over this instant!
Leader Shy Guy: Kiss my ass!
(The scene then shows three Shy Guys, a red one, yellow one, and a blue one, shooting towards the cop car, which then swerves to the side of the truck to avoid the gun shots)
Meggy: (Hanging out of the window, shooting towards the Shy Guys)
Red Shy Guy: (Falls off the truck) AHH! Oh my ass. (Gets run over by the truck and the cop car, then is flung to the side of the road)
Leader Shy Guy: (Gets angrier, and makes a sharp turn)
Yellow Shy Guy: (Throws a Bob-omb towards Meggy) Get lost you parasite!
Meggy: (Hits the Bob-omb away with a baseball bat)
Bob-omb: (Smashes through a window)
Random Girl: Honey is that you?
Bob-omb: EXPLODEEE..!!
Random Girl: (Screaming from the explosion)
Mr. Hall Monitor: STOP BREAKING THE LAW ASSHOLE! (Ramming into the back of the truck)
Yellow Shy Guy: (Falls off the truck onto a window of the cop car) STOP THE CAR PLEASE!!!
Meggy: (Presses the button to roll up the window, then looks away in embarrassment)
Yellow Shy Guy: NOOOO..! (Gets flung away from the car) AHHHH...!
Leader Shy Guy: (Looks around) What?!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Drives the car to the side of the truck)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Hey there buddy... (Shows the video of kawaii Mario dancing on his monitor)
Leader Shy Guy: (Screaming and freaking out)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Meggy, take the wheel.
Meggy: W-what?
Mr. Hall Monitor: I SAID TAKE IT!
Meggy: (Takes the wheel as Mr. Hall Monitor told her to)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Emerges from the cop car to the roof of the cop car, then jumps to the top of the truck)
Blue Shy Guy: AHH! I love you!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Shoots the Blue Shy Guy off the roof, which causes the Blue Shy Guy to scream)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Hmmm.. (Then becomes in shock to realize there is no one driving the truck)
Meggy: MR MONITOR, WATCH OUT!!!
Mr. Hall Monitor: Huh? (Realizes that the truck is speeding towards the wall of a building) HOLY SH*T!! (Jumps back to the top of the roof, and runs to the back of it, jumping into the passenger side of the cop car)
(The truck then smashes into the building, causing the front of the truck to explode)
Mr. Hall Monitor: WE HAVE TO SAVE THE CIVILIANS!!! (Runs to the back of the burning truck, jumps into the truck, and throws the crates outside the truck)
Meggy: (Looks down at one of the crates)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Runs back to the crates)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Dont worry, you're all safe now
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Opens the crate)
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (Looks inside the crate, smiling)
Meggy: (In shock) WHAT?!
(It is now revealed that the crates contained moniters)
Meggy: (Confused) Uh.. they're all.. Monitors?
Mr. Hall Monitor: Yes!
Mr. Hall Monitor: And these monsters were illegally trafficking these poor people.
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Rocks one of the monitors with a happy expression on his face)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Talking to the monitor) Dont worry, you're safe now
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (Hears a noise, only to see the Leader Shy Guy cowardly running inside a building)
Mr. Hall Monitor: But our job here isn't done yet. (Places down the monitor, reloads his gun, and runs over to where the Leader Shy Guy went)
Meggy: (Reloads her gun) I'm right behind you.
The Fight Scene[]
Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor: (Walking inside of the building, looking at all of the monitors in the crates)
Mr. Hall Monitor: My god...how many humans has this sick monster trafficked?
Leader Shy Guy: (Reloads gun, then shoots towards Mr. Hall Monitor and Meggy) Two kids gonna die tonight!
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Hides behind a wall, then jumps towards Leader Shy Guy)
Leader Shy Guy: AHHHHH! (Pulls out a monitor and a spray bottle full of water)
Mr. Hall Monitor: You monster! LET HIM GO!
Leader Shy Guy: (Sprays the water at Mr. Hall Monitor)
Mr. Hall Monitor: (Getting electrocuted) Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow..
Leader Shy Guy: (Running into a different room) WOOOO! LATER!
Meggy: (Runs up towards Mr. Hall Monitor) MR MONITOR!!! ARE YOU OKAY?!
Mr. Hall Monitor: If I don't make it out of this...
Mr. Hall Monitor: please...
Mr. Hall Monitor: ...tell my wife I love her. (Gives Meggy an amulet with the pictures of the microwave and toaster from earlier)
Mr. Hall Monitor: Ow ow ow, ow ow.. (Blue screens)
Meggy: (Looks down and closes her eyes in sadness, then lifts her head up and opens her eyes, clearly angry)
Meggy: Don't worry, Mr. Monitor (Reloads gun)
Meggy: I'll enforce justice
Meggy vs Leader Shy Guy Fight[]
Leader Shy Guy: (Walking while laughing) Ahahaha! (Runs towards the exit)
Meggy: (Jumps from out of no where, gun pointed at the Leader Shy Guy)
Leader Shy Guy: (Screams and runs behind a shelf of boxes)
Meggy: (Shoots towards the Leader Shy Guy, but only ends up hitting the shelf of boxes)
Leader Shy Guy: (Rapidly shooting towards Meggy) DIE BITCH!
Meggy: (Hiding behind a wall)
Meggy: STOP! WHY DO YOU WANT THESE MONITORS SO BADLY?!
Leader Shy Guy: I NEED TO PLAY FORTNITE ON THE BEST QUALITY MONITORS!
Leader Shy Guy: (Shooting randomly towards Meggy) LEAVE ME BEEE!
Meggy: (Tries to shoot at Leader Shy Guy, only to realize she has no ammo left)
Leader Shy Guy: (Laughs)
Meggy: (Rapidly trying to use her gun, but then sees a shiny red valve, which she then throws her gun at, causing the room to fill with smoke)
Leader Shy Guy: (Looking around) OH MY GOD! (Shooting randomly everywhere)
Leader Shy Guy: Hey..where'd you go?
Leader Shy Guy: (Walks around trying to find her, only to hear her coming from a box)
Leader Shy Guy: (Looks inside the box) GOTCHA BITCH!
(It is then realized that a walkie talkie was placed in the box to give the impression that it was Meggy)
Leader Shy Guy: What the hell...
Meggy: (Pops up from the box behind him) So close
Leader Shy Guy: What?!
Meggy: (Kicks the Leader Shy Guy into a microwave)
Leader Shy Guy: (Screaming while crying)
Meggy: (Nods in victory)
Meggy: (Looking at Mr. Hall Monitor, who is still blue screened) C'mon Mr. Monitor, let's go fix you up (Turns off the screen for Mr. Hall Monitor, causing him to reboot, revealing that his monitor is the version of Microsoft Windows Xp)
Mr. Hall Monitor: I saw what you did...
Mr. Hall Monitor: You did a pretty good job there Meggy
Meggy: (Happy that she did a good job) R-really!?
Mr. Hall Monitor: Yeah, I'm glad you helped out today
(The scene ends with Meggy and Mr. Hall Monitor walking out the exit, with Mr. Hall Monitor leaning against Meggy)
Meggy: Does that mean I can become an enforcer of justice like you!?
Mr. Hall Monitor: ...haha. Not so fast kiddo. You still have lots to learn.
Ending Scene[]
(The scene shows Mario and Luigi inside of Mario's House)
Luigi: (Walking towards Mario, holding a microwave) Surprise bro! I got us a replacement microwave after you broke the old one! (Places down the microwave on the table)
Mario: Woohoo! (Opens the microwave, revealing that it is the same one that Meggy kicked the Leader Shy Guy inside of)
(The scene ends with the Leader Shy Guy, Mario, and Luigi screaming in shock)