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Well, perhaps not in severe need, but we really need to fix it up! Grammar, vocab, whatever is needed, it's needed!

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THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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This is the transcript for SMG4: Stupid Paper Mario by SMG4.

Transcript

(SMG4 intro.)

SMG4: EVERYBODY, RUN! IT'S AN EMERGENCY!

SMG4: *he has a panicked expression on his face* Guys, almost all of my money is gone!

Luigi: Oh no! How? Did someone steal it?

*cut to SMG4 playing a crane game, trying to get a Thomas the Train Engine toy*

SMG4: Without enough money, I have to make my videos at a lower quality...

Mario: Well it's a good thing nobody cares. :D

*Mario becomes Paper Mario*

Luigi: Waaa! Oh no! Help! * Luigi become a two-dimensional Mama Luigi*

Toad: HAHA!

*Toad is reduced to a picture of a fungus*

SMG4: Oh no...it's already spreading! Since my video quality is so low...everything's turning into paper and crap!

*Yoshi and Wario are afflicted by the low quality curse*

Mario: Oh come on, this isn't too bad...

Peach: *she is now a 8-bit sprite* Mario!, I'm feeling extra pretty today!

Mario: OH GOD IT'S HORRENDOUS! SMG4 FIX THIS! Just take Peach's money!

*Two gold coins became Monopoly money*

SMG4: Eww no! I can't use this fake ass paper money!

Mario: Don't worry, Mario will save your broke ass and get some real money!

*Mario leaves the castle, which is starting to be afflicted by the video's low quality*

*Mario sees a ? Block*

Mario: This gonna be so easy! There's a coins always lying around!

*Mario hits the block, only to discover that there's paper money inside*

Mario: MAMA***er!

*Mario sees there's a barn up ahead*

Mario: Hmm..oh! Maybe there's some coins in that barn!

*Mario investigates the barn*

Mario: Hello? Money?

*Inside the barn is Goombario and his father.*

Goompapsta: Hello there traveler! Welcome to this here barn! We're not like other goomb-

*Mario leaps on top of Goompapsta and ground pounds on him.*

Mario: Hey..there's no money coming out.

Goompapsta: Bitch!

Gombario: Wow! It's the Mario! Gramps, My friend Goombs told me about him! Maybe he can help us with the rascals promblem, Granpsta!

*Hood music plays while Goompapsta shows Mario the rascals!*

Goompapsta: You see, this kids... They listen to the rap music, which gives them the brain damage...

*Goompapsta continues talking gibberish*

Goombario: Sorry, What he means to say is that we have these rascals that keep playing on our crops but today we turned into paper! So we don't stand a chance against them...

Mario: That's really interesting... Can I have some money now?

Goombario: They probably have money...I guess?

Mario: YEEEAH BOIII!!

Goompapsta: Hold on fella, let me teach you about how to fight!

Goompapsta: So you gotta always take turns, that's what my mama use to tell me-

*Mario singing his main theme song while killing the Rascal goombas one by one*

Goompapsta: You're suppose to TAKE TURNS, goddammit!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Goombario: Oh no, Mario! Take this!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Mario: They didn't have any money... :(

Goombario: You did it! Wow, You're amazing Mario!

Goombario: I wanna help you fix this paper mess! Pa, Can I please go with Mario??

Goompapsta: I DON'T GIVE FUCK!

Goombario has joined the party!
He can use his tattle abilities to describe enemies.

Mario: Wow... You can read minds, WHAT AM I THINKING OF RIGHT NOW!?

Goombario: Uhh...I can't read minds but... judging by drooling mouth...food?

Mario: MIND BLOWN!

Mario: Hello? Money?

Kooper: Hey! Lemme out!

Koopa #1: Is he sick???

Koopa #2: He has AIDS!!!

Koopa #3: Why is he paper??

Koopa #4: Nice ass.

Koopa #5: HE'S EVIL!

Koopa #6: He's a witch!

Koopa: What's the diagnosis, Doctor?

Dr. Mario: You have AIDS (Yes, you have AIDS)

Dr. Mario: ♪ I hate to tell you, boy, that you have AIDS (You've got the AIDS) ♪

Dr. Mario: ♪ You may have caught it when you stuck that filthy-

Mario: Helllooo? Do any of you scrubs have some money?

Koopa: THAT MAN HAS IT! IT'S SPREADING!!!

(Koopas panicking)

Kooper: Hey can you guys set me free!!?

Mario: Can't you just slide through the holes since you're made of paper?

Kooper: ...Fuck you.

Goombario: Don't worry, We just have to explain and they'll understand!

(A tank rolls in)

Koopa: EXTERMINATE THE DISEASE!

Mario, Goombario, Kooper: SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!

Mario: Oh boy, more civilian fatalities. :D

Dr. Mario: You have AIDS- AHHH MY PENIS!

Goombario: Stay back...I know stuff about you!... uhh...You! You're Jeff and you used friend's toothbrush to unclog your toilet!

Jeff's friend: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!?

Jeff: What? No. No I don't...

Jeff's friend: Goddammit Jeff!

Jeff: AAH!

Yellow Ninjakoopa: Stop right there! The Koopa Bros. is here to stop you!

Black Ninjakoopa: Okay team, attack formation: ROCKET!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Mario: Mario once again protects the innocent! :D

Parakarry: Oh GOD! Everyone is DEAD!

Mario: Oh man...But I still need money... :(

Kooper: Oh! I know a fabled cave that is said to hold legendary treasure! Please let me join! I can help you retrieve things with my spin attack!

Mario: Retrieve stuff...huh?...

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Kooper has joined your party!

Kooper: Alright...Here is the infamous cave that I've heard about... I've known some people who went in but never came out... But I hated all of them so it doesn't matter. Let's go!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Goombario: *sigh*... We're lost. Aren't we...?

Mario: Whaat? pfft, hell no! Uh... Oh look! It's a map! We're saved! :D

*Mario reads the map*

Mario: See, it say right here that we're...

Mario: Okie dokie, who wants to cry with me?

Kooper: I'm sorry guys...Instead of finding treasure...I made us all lost...

Mario: Hey it's okay. No hard feelings. Mario gets lost in the bathroom all the time.

*Something approaches Mario*

Mario: TAKE THE CHILD FIRST!

Goombario: Hey!

Mario: Kooper! Use a special attack or something!

Kooper: I JUST SHIT MY PANTS!!

Mario: Oh Hey, That's my special attack too! :D

???: WOOF! OH BOI! OH BOI! HOOOOMAN!

Chompers: Oh boy! This first time Chompers seen hooman since 1000 years!

Mario: Awww, It's a fugly looking doggy. :DD

Goombario: Wow, Apparently this Chomp is from an ancient era of the Mushroom Kingdom!

Chompers: Yeah, silly hoomans forget me, now this Chomper's home.

Mario: Hey doggy, fetch! :D

Goombario: Excuse me, Mr. Chompers. But we're looking for a fabled treasure in this cave...

Chompers: Ooh! Chompers can help! Silly hoomans forgot their savings in cave long ago! I can take you!

Chompers has joined your party!
THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Kolorado (Explorer): My God. The legendary treasure of Koopa Cave... Right at my fingertips...

*Crashes right atop of him*

You got 25 real coins! :D That should be enough!

*Mario and rest celebrates*

Mario: We did it!

Goombario: We did it!

Kooper: We did it! (YAAAY)

Mario: Lo hicimos! We did it!- WAHH!

(SMG4's Low quality has spread further, effects began to worsen)

Goombario: Ahh! I'm feeling weird... What's happening???

Kooper: Ahh! I'm feeling it too!

Mario: Oh no! Everyone's turning into crappier versions! There's not much time left!!!

Mario: To Peach's Castle!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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SMG4 (Paper): STOP RIGHT HERE!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Mario: Nooo! Not... gonna make it!

THAT BAFOON! THAT BAFOON!
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Mario: Waaahh! Whatta Ya Doing? What's goin' on here? Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!

Luke Lerdwichagul: *sigh* goddammit... I wish I had some money.

Mario: Hey stinky!

Luke Lerdwichagul: Oh, Mario!? What are you doing-

Mario: TAKE-A-DAT!

Luke Lerdwichagul: *gasp* Is it what I think it is? It's actual money! LET THE MEMES FLOW! I CAN MAKE VIDEOS AGAIN!!!

Mario: Ooh! Everything's back to normal!

SMG4: Hi-five! :D

Mario: GET A JOB, HIPPIE!

SMG4 proceeded to waste all his money on crane games again and became a hobo.

THE END :D

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