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This page is the transcript for SMG4: The Movie Audition.
Transcript[]
(Glitch Productions and SMG4 intro)
*Mario is in his house watching a remix of the Ground theme while laughing. Suddenly he gets a notification*
Mario: Dafuq? *notices SMG4's video looking for actors, clicks on it and becomes interested* Ooh! I got to get that acting role!!! :D
*At Peach's castle...*
Receptionist: NEXT!!
Mario: *crashes through the roof* YIPPEE! Ey!
Receptionist: What can I do for you today, Sweetie?
Mario: GIVE ME THAT ACTING ROLE OR IMMA BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE. :D
Receptionist: Registrations are in that line!
Mario: WOAH!! Oh NOOOO!! *notices the incredibly long line around the room* MAMAF*****R! Piece A' Sheait!
SMG4: Welcome everyone... I'm going to have you guys re-enact scenes from famous movies and the best actor... will get the special role in my movie... SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!
Titanic (1997)[]
Waluigi: Ahaha! Yeah!
Wario: Mama mia...
Waluigi: Step up onto the railing.
Wario: *thrown overboard* SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.
Waluigi: Hold on. Keep your eyes closed. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Wario: *sigh* Fuck You. *Waluigi lifts Wario up* I'm flying! :D
Waluigi: You heavy bitch! VROOOM VROOOM VROOOM
Old Man: WHAT ARE YOU, GAY?!?!
*the iceberg appears from the ocean*
Waluigi: ♪ OOOOHHH SHIIIIIIIT. *drops Wario* THE WHOOOLE SHIP IS FUUUCKED!! ♬
The Lion King (1994)[]
Bob: What up bitches it's me that one with ass monkey from The Lion King. YO, I heard there was a new baby, and shit. Where is it?
Boopkins: Hey guys, I'm Simba! Lalalala Simba Simba Simba.
Bob: Great, come here bitch, you're Simba and shit stay still goddammit. I'm trying to paint you. *trying to pick up Boopkins* Sweet, I got the lion baby. Hooray, I'm gonna show you off for no reason.
*walks towards the cliff with Boopkins in hand*
Boopkins: No put me down, What are you doing?!
Bob: Fuck outta here! *throws Boopkins off the cliff*
Boopkins: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Bob: Goddamn I deserve an Oscar for this!
Jaws (1975)[]
Luigi: *laughing* Luigi! Luigi! Oh yeah!
Heavy: *singing*
*a shark starts to approach Luigi and Heavy's boat*
Luigi: Eh? Wah!
*the shark turns out to be Mario*
Mario: Hoo hoo! Hello! It's a me! *jumps onto the boat* Wee-hee!
Heavy: Help now! *sinks into Mario's mouth* OHHHHH NOOOO! GAHHHHHHH!
*Mario eats Heavy*
Mario: Blegh! * spits out Heavy afar* That tastes like shit! *starts to shake the boat* Come on! Come on! Come here fishy fishy! Here fishy fishy!
*The sandvich falls into Mario's mouth*
Mario: NOM. Yeah! This makes me so happy, thank you so much that was a lots of fun! *dives back into the ocean* Weeeee...
Luigi: Okay...
Heavy: Wow, what an asshole!
Up (2009)[]
*Toadsworth notices two workers from the nursing home have come to pick him up*
Toadsworth: You'll never take me in!!! *presses a button to release the balloons* So long boys!
*the balloons rip off Toadsworth's roof*
Toadsworth: Shit!
Aladdin (1992)[]
Swagmaster: Hey Chris! You know what time it is?!
Chris: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE DON'T-
Swagmaster: ♪ I can show you the world ♫
Chris: Shit...
Swagmaster: ♪ Shining, shittering, SWAGNESS ♬
Chris: I'm gonna jump.
Swagmaster: ♪ Tell me, Chris, now when was the last time you let your heart decide?- ♫
Chris: *jumps off* AAAHHHH!!
*DED*
Swagmaster: Asshole.
Toy Story (1995)[]
Mario: Look, I'm Woody! Howdy, howdy, howdy!
King Kong (1933)[]
*Donkey Kong, as King Kong, wrecks New York while sitting on a building. Kamek in Peach's dress calls out for help.*
Kamek: Oh god, somebody help me... *gibberish* help me...
*Donkey Kong notices some fighter planes approaching him*
Donkey Kong: I'm gonna kill you, and I'll keep kill- *Two planes pass by him*
Cuphead/Mugman: Like a somebody, f**k you bitch!
Donkey Kong: Oi!
Cuphead: Get that motherf**ker!
*Donkey Kong engages a Cuphead themed fight with the Boys*
Announcer: A brawl is surely brewing! Here it goes!
Kamek: Someone help me... *Donkey Kong picks him up* Ahhh! Let go, let go! Let go, please! *gets thrown* Ahhhhhh!
*Kamek hits Cuphead's plane*
Cuphead: SHIIIIIII...
*Mugman gasps, and Kamek returns like a boomerang to Donkey Kong. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Patrick then try to shoot Donkey Kong in their plane.*
Patrick: *imitating gun noises* DIVEBOMB!
SpongeBob: Patrick!
*Donkey Kong raises his fist at the duo*
Patrick: And then comes a giant fist!
SpongeBob: Patrick, no-
*Donkey Kong smashes the two's fighter plane*
Donkey Kong: This isn't even my final form. EXPAND DONG. *unleashes a barrel from his Pingas and fires at Mugman, who now screams*
William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet (1996 movie adaption)[]
Bowser: Bwwwaaaahahaha!
Peach: O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo?
Bowser: Oh Juliet, My love. I have been meaning to tell you something...
Peach: Oh? And what is that?...
Bowser: Gimme dat PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSS--AY!
Peach: *...*
Bowser: Can I have-a the pussy please?! *Peach rejects him* PLEASE! PLEASE GIMME THE PUSSY!
♪It's been a long day...♪
The Matrix (1999)[]
*Mario is wearing black overalls and Meggy has a black outfit and shades*
Toad: You two, not another step. Don't come this way. Dont'cha dare move!
*Mario slides forward to the PINGAS sound effect*
Toad: WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY?!
*Toad shoots at Meggy, but she dodges the bullets Matrix style*
Toad: YOU BITCH!
*Mario looks at Toad, and something gets him startled*
Toad: (While shooting) SUCK MY DIIIIIIIIICK!! HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAA!
*Mario tries to perform the same dodge as Meggy, but fails*
Forrest Gump (1994)[]
Steve: Hello! My name's Steve. Do you want a chocolate? My mama always said, "Life is like a box a chocolate, you never know what your going to get".
*Xenomorph alien warrior rages from chest*
Koopa Troopa: HOLY SHIT!!
*Xenomorph lunges at the Koopa Troopa and gives him a beatdown, while the latter screams*
Steve: Those must be comfortable shoes, I wish I has shoes like that.
Back to the Future (1985)[]
E. Gadd: If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour, You're gonna see some serious shit! *E. Gadd and Luigi hop into the DeLorean time machine and accelerate their way into the past, hitting a crossing Goomba on the way there* 86 miles a hour... 88 miles a ho-
*The two crash into a random naked guy's house*
Person: WAH OH MY GOD!!
E. Gadd: Great scott! We're in the future!
Luigi: ...Oh boy. The future looks sexy. :D
Charlie & the Chocolate Factory (2005)[]
Tubbie Wonka: Hold your breath. Make a wish. Count to three. ♬Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination♬ ♬Take a look and you'll see into your imagination♬.
*Tubbie Wonka arrives at the production room and unveils Tinky Winky taking a dump*
Tinky Winky: *yelling, before crapping out some tubby custard* All done!
Bowser Jr: CUUUUEEEEEELLLLLLLLL!!!!
The Fast and The Furious (2001)[]
Toad: Wassup? ♬THEY SEE ME ROLLIN', THE HATIN'! PATROLIN, TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY! TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY! TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY! TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY! TRYING TO CATCH ME RIDIN' DIRTY! MY MUSIC'S SO LOUD, I'M SWANGIN'! THEY HOPIN' THAT THEY GON' CATCH ME RIDIN...♬ MalleoTehPlumber: Uh...do you hear that? Sounds like someones having a stroke... Police: Nah, its probably nothing.
Harry Potter (2001)[]
Take 1: Quidditch Field[]
Hagrid: Oh Hello There!
Frankie: Hi...
Hagrid: You're a Wizard.
Frankie: I'm a what? Listen here Hagrid, I'm just Harry!
Hagrid: No! ye speckie bowl hair cut fucked small dick skinny f*ck eat more wanker. You're a wizard.
Frankie: I'll fucking gnaw your arm off Hagrid!
Hagrid: Get near my arm and I'll slap you cross face like a little bitch.
Take 2: Class[]
Dumbledore: So remember children, It's Wingardium Levieosa, swish and a flick!
Student: Swish and Flick!
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!*
Frankie: Oh Shit! Wingardium Leviosa.
Dumbledore: HAHAHAHAHA!!! *starts to levitate* WHAT THE FUCK?!?! OH MY FUCKING GOD, SOMEBODY *crashes through the Hogwarts Academy roof* AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! *now in outer space* Ahh... Piss!
Super Mario Bros. (1993)[]
Mario: IT'S-A-ME-MAAAAARIOOO! EHEHEHEHE.
*offset*
SMG4: Oh what a beautiful performance...Mario! You nailed your character perfectly! I've been watching your acting and you're perfect for the role!
Mario: Ooh hoo hoo hoo! Oh yeah!
The SMG4 Movie (2017)[]
Woman: Help! Someone stole my purse!!!
Robber: Yeah boiiiiiii!
SMG4: DON'T WORRY! I'LL SAVE IT! *dashes after the robber, with a brief background cameo of Mario*
*paused*
Mario: Luigi! Look! That's me!! I made it to the big screen! :DDDD Mario is a famous!!!! :DDD haha! Sucked in!
*Luigi leaves*
Mario: Look at this! Kiss my ass bitches!