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This is SMG4: Mario Gets Scammed's official transcript.
Video[]
[States of Survival Advertisement]
(The video shows zombies invading the tower Saiko and Bob are in)
(Saiko tries her best to block the zombies from coming in by keeping the door shut)
Bob: We'Re DoOmEd. ThErE'S tOo MaNy Of tHeM
Saiko: We need help. Wheres SMG4?
(SMG4 suddenly breaks the door, letting the zombies go in and Saiko fling)
SMG4: Oh, I'm just happily playing today's sponsor; State of Survival!
(A zombie infects a certain character)
SMG4: State of Survival is a free survival-strategy mobile game! where you go through a post-apocalyptic landscape where almost EVERYONE in the world has been turned into zombies!
Saiko: Shut up and help us already!
SMG4: I don't need to! Because in state of survival you can choose from over 50 awesome heroes to fight zombies with
SMG4: Including an anime girl, a K-POP singer, AND an old woman!
SMG4: I mean - look at her! Who doesn't want to be a bush killing zombies?
SMG4: We've got a weaponized wheelchair too!
(Another zombie is about to infect a certain character)
Zombie: YOU'RE GETTING 7 ACROSS THE ASS!
(The Old Lady eliminates the zombie)
[OLD LADY]
SMG4: The game even has its own building mechanics where you can make your own settlement
SMG4: Skew it against zombies and rescue civilians!
SMG4: It's so easy!
SMG4: They'll even collect resources for you while you're away.
SMG4: Plus, the game's multiplayer allows you to team up an form alliances with your friends to hunt down even more zombies and gather resources!
(Saiko and Bob equip a gun and start shooting the zombies)
SMG4: So download the game today using this QR code or click the link in the description
SMG4: And, if you use my creator code "SMG4SOS" (Just Ignore). you can get a free starter pack with the Rust Hero and a ton of cool loot!
SMG4: And now onto the video!!
(SMG4 gets infected by zombies)
[SMG4 Intro]
Bob; Yo WhAtUp. WeLcOmE tO BoB'S PaWnShOp!
Bob: BuY, sElL, aNd TrAdE mE MonEy.
Bob: IsN'T tHaT rIgHt MeGgy?
(Meggy is reluctant)
Bob: Meggy, say the lines.
Meggy: This whole thing is so stupid.
Meggy: Why did I even sign up to this?
Bob: BeCaUsE MeGgy, ThE hOtEl IsN'T DeAd. AnD iF wE dOn'T mAkE mOnEy,
Bob: YoU wOn'T hAvE a hoMe.
(Meggy realizes)
Meggy: (*Reluctantly*) PLEEEEASE COME ON DOWN TO BOB'S PAWN SHOP!!
Meggy: Woo-hooo!!
Meggy: We got the best prices, and stuff to buy!
Meggy: (Sigh) Oh boy...
(Meggy gets interviewed)
[Meggy Spetzer: Victim of debt, also loves ramen]
Meggy: Oh, this way?
Meggy: Okay.
Meggy: Hi. I'm Meggy.
Meggy: And...I'm being forced to work here.
Meggy: Or I'll be homeless...
Meggy: So yeah!
Megy: That's my life right now!
Meggy: I...clearly got everything together...
(Meggy tries not to be pissed by lying down on her chair)
(Meggy reluctantly dances in front of a camera)
Bob: AaAaAaAnD cUt!
(Meggy falls on the ground and feels her sins crawling on her back)
Meggy: Goodbye, dignity. Goodbye, pride...
Bob: GoOd RiDdAnCe, YoU wOn'T bE nEeDiNg ThAt WhErE wE'Re gOiNg.
Meggy: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GAMBLED MY ENTIRE HOUSE AWAY!!
Bob: I dIdN'T GaMbLe YoUr HoUsE. i GaMbLeD The HoTeL.
(Throwback to when Bob was at a casino)
Bob: WhIcH, jUsT sO hApPeNs To HaVe YoUr HoUsE iN iT.
Bob: HeY LoOk A cUsToMer!
(Boopkins walks in the shop upset)
Bob: RuNnInG a PaWnShOp Is HaRdWoRk. AnD i'M nOt ToO sUrE The NeW eMpLoYeE wIlL bE aBlE tO HaNdlE iT.
Bob: BuT yOu KnOw WhAt? If AnYoNe CaN TeAcH hEr, It'S mE
Boopkins: Hey Bob... I heard about the hotel. I'm so sorry-
Bob: NeVerMiNd ThAt. WoUlD yOu LiKe To BuY sOmE oF My WaReS?
Boopkins: .......
Boopkins: Huh?
Boopkins: What wares?
(.......)
Bob: uH.
(Bob dashes to the storage room)
(Bob jumps into the trash)
Bob: HoW WoUlD yOu LiKe To BuY tHiS mAgiCaL cAn Of uSeD bEaNs?
Boopkins: No.. I'm ok. I just-
Bob: It'Ll... HeLp YoU gEt...
Bob: aLl ThE wOmEn.
Boopkins OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH!!!! :D
Bob: FoR yOu. OnLy $99.
[$99.00]
Boopkins: OOOOOooooooh! :o
Boopkins: I'll take your entire stock!
(Bob gives the used beans to Boopkins)
Boopkins: Yay!
Boopkins: ....
Boopkins: How do I use it?
Bob: uH.
Bob: StIcK yOuR rAbBy OlLiE iN iT.
Boopkins: Ok!
Bookins: (Exits the pawnshop) Yaaaaaaaay!
(Bob looks at the money he earned happily)
Meggy: Not a fan of the whole Pawn shop thing
Meggy: it feels like one big seedy con
(The video shows Bob applying the diamond color of a dirt block using a paint roller)
Meggy: Why wouldn't people just go to Amazon anyway?
(Bob gives the "diamond" block to Steve)
Steve: Yaaaay. yaaaay :D
(Steve gives Bob his money and Alex)
(Boopkins gets interviewed)
[FISHY BOOPKINS: LOCAL FISH AND NUSIANCE)
Boopkins: I took the cans of beans home...
(In the background, JubJub jumps onto the table and eats the used beans, and I mean the entire thing including the can)
Boopkins: And put my ravioli in it...
(Boopkins loses his motivation or something)
(JubJub flies upwards)
Boopkins: But no women came... :(
(Bob places a bottle of bleach an anti-age potion and gives it to the Old Man Hobo)
(The Old Man Hobo gives his money to Bob)
Old Man Hobo: (Grabs the anti-age potion) Aw hell yeah!
(Bob Looks at Meggy)
Bob: Ok MegGy, I tHinK iT'S tImE yOu GivE iT a ShOt
Meggy: Why am i going along with it?
Meggy: Well...a girl's gotta eat
Mario: 🎵Fortnite Battle Pass. I just sh*t at my ass. 🎵
Mario: Hey meggy! Got any spaghetti?
Meggy: Spaghetti? No, but I got... uhh...
(Meggy extends her hand)
Bob: (Feed a money bag with milk) DoN'T WoRrY. PaPa'S hErE.
(Meggy grabs a shoe)
Meggy: This....Shoe?
Meggy: Ooooh!
Mario: Shoe?
Mario: (Shows his shoes) Marios got shoes already
Meggy: These aren't ordinary shoes these are...
Meggy: uh...these are...
(Mario looks at Meggy suspiciously)
Meggy: Uh... Uhm...
(Mario keeps looking at Meggy suspiciously)
(Meggy gets nervous)
Meggy: Uhh...Uhm...
Mario: (Gets close to Meggy) What are they meggy?
Meggy: THEY WERE UH...
Meggy: TH-TH-THEY WERE WORN BY THAT GUY THAT...
Meggy: THAT INVENTED TOMATO SAUCE
Mario: :O
(Mario jumps)
Mario: YEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!!
(Mario throws his money at Meggy and grabs the legendary shoe)
(Mario exits the store while running)
(Bob spots the money)
Bob: Oohoohoo! Money money money!
(Bob kisses the money)
(...and then brings it to the storage room)
Meggy: Maybe I am out for this after all.
Bob: Meggy is totally hopeless.
Bob: She has no idea what she doing?
Meggy: (offscreen) Hey! I heard that?
Bob: But let's see how she does with buying stuff and ripping people off.
[Credit roll, the video ends with Meta Knight's theme]