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This is the transcript for SMG4 Movie: WESTERN SPAGHETTI.
Scene 1: Introduction[]
(The TBH Creature pops out from a cow's skull, runs off, and bumps into someone's boots. It looks up to see Meggy in cowgirl attire. She walks past the little TBH as her two partners follow close behind.)
Meggy: The name's Meggy. Meggy Spletzer. I'm just your average inkling turned human. This is my deputy, Tari, the kindest and most trustworthy soul in the West. (Tari jumps in fright at a rolling tumbleweed.) She's trying her best. And this... this is Mario. He's just an idiot. (Mario goes over to eat a part of a cactus.) But, he's also my best friend.
Mario: Yummy!
Meggy: Right now, I'm on a mission to find my idol, One Shot Wren. We go way back.
(Flashback. Wren gives a young Meggy his beanie.)
Meggy: He's my inspiration, and made me who I am today.
(Flashback ends.)
Meggy: And he's somewhere here... in the Wild West!
Scene 2: Welcome to the Wild West[]
(The trio continue their trek through the wilderness.)
Mario: Meggyyyyyyy! Are we there yet?
Tari: Yeah, the horses are getting tired.
(The horses they brought with them fall tiredly to the ground.)
Mario: WE HAVE HORSES? WHY AREN'T WE RIDING THEM!?
Meggy: ...Hide... Now.
Tari: (Panicking) WHY! WHA! (She brings out her revolver.) Am I gonna die!
Meggy: Bandits! 12 o'clock.
(The bandits in question consist of Shroomy, Jeeves, Whimpu, Rob, Jubjub, Old Man Hobo, and Belle. Together, they make up...)
THE MISCELLANEOUS SEVEN
(Shroomy looks up from playing his harmonica to see Meggy, Mario, and Tari in the distance.)
Mario: Hello!
(That got the Miscellaneous Seven's attention. Everyone on both sides gather for a showdown.)
Shroomy: What brings you 'round these parts, partner?
Meggy: Well well... the Miscellaneous Seven. How did I know you'd be behind the disappearance of One Shot Wren?
Shroomy: No idea what you're talking about. But, if you come asking for trouble, then we're gonna have to serve you.
Meggy: Nothing I hate more than bandits. I bet that wagon is full of people you've murdered.
(Everyone stares each other down... Until Mario shoots the TBH creature.)
Mario: (Firing like crazy) HOOTENANNY TIIIIME!!!!!
(The Seven duck for cover before firing back. The trio on the other side hide behind a large rock.)
Meggy: OK, Mario. Standard SplatSquad formation. You distract them, and I'll flank them on the right.
Mario: Okie dokie!
Tari: W-What about me?
Meggy: You, uh... You stay here and... not get hurt!
Tari: But, I can be useful! I've been practicing on my gun skills! (As soon as she says this, her hat gets shot off.)
(As more bullets get exchanged, Mario leaps out and fires while Meggy goes over and kicks Jubjub.)
Out of the park
(Belle runs off, and Meggy shoots the revolver out of Shroomy's hand before hitting him four times.)
Strike
(Mario goes over to Jeeves.)
Mario: Wake the frick up, samurai. I'mma burn your asshole.
(Mario uses Jeeves as a shield against the bullets.)
Whimpu: Give me one second to reload!
(While reloading, Mario's has impaled Old Man Hobo onto Jeeves.)
Mario: You're next, boy!
(Whimpu runs off, but Mario throws Jeeves and perfectly hits him. Belle pulls out a machine gun.)
Belle: AARGGHHHHH, THIS IS DEFINITELY A WESTERN GUN!
(Meggy hides behind a crate. Belle fires at the crate,m breaking it, but Meggy has vanished... Then she shows up to kick Belle in the face. Belle lands in the wagon, and the bags inside spill open, revealing potatoes.)
Meggy: What the? Potatoes? You guys aren't bandits?
Shroomy: That's what I've been trying to tell you! We're just humble potato farmers!
Meggy: Wait, so you DIDN'T kidnap One Shot Wren?
Shroomy: No! The only kidnapping we've been doing is of these salacious spuds! So good, you could eat it raw!
The Seven: So good, you could eat it raw! (They chow down on their spuds.)
Meggy: (Collapses on the ground in defeat) You guys were our only lead... now we're never going to find him!
Belle: Actually... I think I did hear something about One Shot Wren. Word out here is he's going to be attacking the nearby town: The town of Western Spaghetti!
Mario: SPAGHETTI!? OOO CAN WE GO MEGGY CAN WE GO!?
Meggy: (Sighs) Did you say "attack"? One Shot Wren would never do that!
Tari: Yeah! One Shot Wren is a hero!
(The Seven laugh at this.)
Shroomy: Oh, that's rich! What a good one!
(He looks over. Mario has begun to steal their wagon.)
Shroomy: Hey! Hey! Get out of there!
Mario: WESTERN SPAGHETIII TIIIIIIIIIME!!!
Meggy: WAIT, MARIO! I'M NOT DONE HERE YET!
Mario: Let's-a go!
(He takes off, being Meggy and Tari with him, but not before kicking Belle out.)
Scene 3: Welcome to Western Spaghetti[]
(In Western Spaghetti, a public execution is about to commence.)
BUFFALO BOB
Swag: Well, Buffalo Bob, looks like your days of being an ass has come to an end. For I! Sheriff SwagMaster6969696969, HAVE FINALLY CAPTURED YOU!
SHERIFF SWAGMASTER6969696969 (His name is too long, it exceeds the freeze frame card.)
Chris: You didn't capture him. I did.
Swag: Shut up, Chris! (To Buffalo Bob) Any last words?
Bob: Only one: Kiss my ass!
Swag: (Counts with his fingers) One... two... three... Hey! That's more than one word!
(Suddenly, Boopkins comes riding in.)
BOOP THE KID
(Everyone dodges him.)
SMG1: IT'S TIME TO SAVE THE DAY- (Gets run over)
(Luigi gets run over, loses his head, and his hat explodes.)
Luigi: My hat...
(More evade Boop.)
SMG3: Whoa, learn to drive, dude!
Swag: OK, Chris, now pull the lever!
(Before Chris could do that...)
Bob: FOOLS! I have swords for hands!
(Bob cuts the rope and escapes on the wagon.)
Swag: (Mad as a hornet) Gosh diggity darn! I forgot about that! Chris... I got rootin' tootin' tricked!
Chris: Why are you talking like that?
Saiko: QUICK! SOMEONE STOP THEM!
SMG4: Yo, 3!
(4 throws a barrel for 3 to roll on, and Saiko whacks it with her hammer, making it go faster.)
SMG3: Yeehawwwwwww... HOLY S***!
Bob: Heehee, losers! Great job Boopkins! We-
Boopkins: BOOOOOOB!
SMG3: (Pulls out dynamite) HERE COMES THE BOOM!
(3 leaps forward and throws the dynamite... Only for Bob to whack them back at him.)
SMG3: Oh, poop...
(BOOM!)
SMG3: Spicy...
Bob: Haha! You've done it now! Tomorrow, I'll be back! Back with One Shot Wren and the rest of our crew!
(He leaves as everyone stands frozen upon hearing that name...)
SMG4: DID... DID HE SAY "ONE SHOT WREN"!?!?
Bowser: NO! ANYONE BUT HIM!
(A laughing Bob sees Mario, Meggy, and Tari riding into town. The two wagons pass each other.)
Meggy: That... was weird.
(The trio enter town. Tari spots 3 on fire.)
SMG3: What the hell are you looking at?
(Tari doesn't respond as the wagon stops.)
Meggy: Uhhh... Hey, guys... is this town Western Spaghetti?
Swag: IT SURE IS! AND IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAY! You're the new sheriff! (He hands his badge to Meggy and runs off laughing.)
Chris: (Going after him) WAIT! WAIT FOR ME, SWAG!
Mario: Hey! Congrats on the promotion, Meggy!
Meggy: Sheriff? I don't want to be a sheriff! What the hell happened here?
SMG4: We're doomed! That's what.
Tari: Doomed!? Well, how come? Those bandits just left!
SMG1: They left, but they said they're gonna be back. This time with... ONE SHOT WREN.
(Everyone panics. Bowser hides in his shell, Melony transforms back to a melon, Karen hisses, and Luigi hides in a barrel.)
Mario: Oh, hey, Luigi!
Luigi: Hello, Mario.
Meggy: Why is everyone acting like One Shot Wren is some sort of monster? He's a good person!
SMG4: Sorry, Meggy... I don't know what you've heard, but... (He holds up a WANTED poster.) One Shot Wren is one of the most infamous outlaws in these parts!
SMG3: And he's done some really evil stuff... Kind of impressive, actually.
Bowser: You're our new sheriff. So, you guys will protect us, right?
Tari: Uhhh, Meggy... We're- We're not gonna do that... Right? I don't know if I want to meet Wren anymore...
(Meggy looks around, trying to find the words to say.)
Meggy: (Breathes in) Look, I'll coach you guys to protect yourselves against bandits, cause... I think you really need it. (Mario tips Luigi in the barrel over and laughs.) I'm telling you, One Shot Wren is a good dude, When we see him tomorrow, I'll talk to him and sort this nonsense out, OK?
(Beat.)
SMG3: Welp, we're probably gonna die, but at least we can say we tried! (He runs off.)
Scene 4: How to Shoot/Aim Your Target[]
(Everyone is at the shooting range.)
Meggy: OK, so it's time to turn you lily livered varmints into a bunch of sharp shooters. Who has actual gun experience here?
(Nobody. ...Nobody but Mario raises their hand up.)
Meggy: Firing wildly and aimlessly doesn't count! (Mario lowers his hand back down.) OK, so we'll start from scratch. Everyone! Get your weapon ready and take aim!
(Everyone pulls guns out, except for SMG3, who brought dynamite.)
Meggy: Your job is simple: Hit the targets! Preferably in the head! Now, get ready! Take aim! Annnndddd... FIRE!
(Everyone begins firing their weapons (Though Mario gets flung back for firing his too much). Despite their efforts, not one target was hit. One target even pulled an Uno reverse card on SMG4. Luigi gets scared and runs off. Meggy then gets surprised by Karen's display.)
Meggy: NOW THAT'S MORE LIKE IT! EVERYONE PAY ATTENTION!
(Unfortunately, Karen runs to a target in sorrow.)
Karen: I feel your pain... I bet they're paying you minimum wage, too...
Meggy: HEY! GET BACK TO SHOOTING! (Karen screeches.)
(Bowser fires his, but gets flung back and crashes into Saiko. Melony is using her gun as a pillow, and Meggy has confiscated 3's dynamite.)
SMG3: GIMME MY DYNAMITE BACK!
Meggy: No! You need to learn how to shoot a gun!
SMG3: BUT ME WANT BOOM BOOM!
Meggy: NOOO!
(Tari tries to pick a revolver up, but has trouble doing so. She eventually picks them up, getting Meggy's attention, thus releasing the dynamite.)
SMG3: (Hugging his dynamite) Come to papa! (BOOM! (karma XD))
Meggy: (To Tari) FOCUS!
(Tari fires.... Aimlessly. Although she did knock down a satellite that crashes down on Mario.)
Mario: Fine shot, mate!
Meggy: I thiiiiiink this gun might be a little too advanced for you... (She hands Tari a squirt gun.)
(Meggy looks at all the damage her trainees did: SMG4 just got UNO Reverse, Luigi being such a scaredy cat, speaking of cat, Karen is good at shooting, but has weakness, Bowser is too weak for a small gun, Saiko can't even dodge or bring her Hammer, Melony is such a sleepy head, SMG3 just rather his BOOM BOOM more, Kaizo being useless, SMG1 is so left behind, SMG2 just poking his own friend, and they both didn't get a chance to play they're role, Mario got crushed by an Satelite, and Tari... she still trying.)
Meggy: (Sighs in disappointment) This is going to be harder than I thought. Alright, everyone up!!! Let's try that again!
Scene 5: Still Training…[]
(The sun has begun to go down and everyone is sitting on the ground, either fast asleep or bored.)
Meggy: NO!! Let's try again! This time, SQUEEZE the trigger!
(No response.)
Meggy: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEZE!!!!
(She accidentally fires, causing a UFO to crash on top of Mario, still trapped underneath the satellite. Mario screams in pain)
Meggy: Crap! Sorry!!
(Still, no one responds, whether to Meggy's instructions or to the UFO crashing on top of Mario.)
Meggy: Come on, guys. We only have till tomorrow. You wanted me to coach you, didn't you? Tari, help me out here.
(She looks over at Tari, not getting a response. Her back's turned to Meggy. She's breathing hard, and she looks like she's seen a ghost...)
Meggy: Tari?
Tari: (Worried like a cat on a hot tin roof (whatever that means lol)) Where... Where am I!?
Meggy: What??
Tari: ...Hey, Meggy! Sorry, I... I think I'm just really tired.
(Meggy looks around. Mario snores while using the UFO as a blanket while Bowser is cuddling with Luigi.)
Meggy: I guess... we'll call it here for the night. You've all worked really hard today.
Scene 6: Hotel for rest[]
(At the hotel, Meggy and Tari are turning in for the night.)
Meggy: How you feeling now?
Tari: I'm... (Yawns) feeling better. Thanks, Meggy.
Meggy: I think... tomorrow, leave the physical stuff to me, alright? You'll get there soon.!
Tari: Oh... Okay...
Meggy: We've had a chat with Mario already, and we'll meet up with him in the morning. Just try to get some rest.
Tari: Meggy...?
Meggy: Yeah? What's up?
Tari: Why'd you bring me along?
Meggy: Because you're my student, of course.
Tari: But... Whenever there's a fight, you just tell me to run and hide... Am I... useless...?
(Meggy throws a pillow at her face.)
Meggy: You're NOT useless. You're just learning.
Tari: But... I'm so weak... I'm not brave... And I can't fight like you do...
Meggy: Tari. Fighting isn't the only way to be strong.
(Flashbacks begin. As Meggy speaks, we see her younger Inkling self cheering on One Shot Wren, being saved by Wren from an enemy, shooting at a range with Tari at Bob's carnival, Melony fighting Zero, SMG3 shouting, Tari hugging a T-Posing Meggy, Meggy sliding down a building with Axol, and hugging Desti.)
Meggy: I used to think that beating everyone in Splatfest was the way to prove myself. But then, I became friends with you and the others, and saw there's different kinds of strength. The best thing about you is your kindness, and how much you want to help people.
(Flashbacks end.)
Meggy: And through this trip, I really believe you'll see that.
Tari: Awww... Meggy... I.... I....
(Before she could say anymore, Tari falls asleep. Meggy lays down as well for a good night's rest...)
Scene 7: Meggy's Nightmare[]
(On the train, everyone is running back and forth for their lives. Smoke fills the train as people fall to the ground.)
Meggy: What's going on!? Somebody help! Who are you people?!
(A shadowy figure ropes down, walks forward and extends their arm out.)
Meggy: STAY BACK!
(Meggy jolts up in bed. She looks around... Tari is missing.)
Meggy: Tari..??
(She runs out of her room and looks down into the hotel's bar... To her surprise, everyone is there, acting like nothing happened. Melony, Kaizo, and Luigi are playing cards, SMG3 accidentally lights up some dynamite when he tried to light up his cigar, SMGs 1 and 2, along with Saiko, are chugging down drinks, and SMG4 is chatting with Karen.)
SMG4: So, what's it like to be a cat? (Karen didn't enjoy hearing that.)
(And Tari? She's reading. Meggy sighs in relief and takes her seat at the bar.)
???: What can I do ya for?
(The barkeeper is revealed to be... Desti?)
Meggy: Hey, Desti. Can I just have a glass of warm milk, please?
Desti: Sure! Comin' right up. (She gets Meggy her drink.) So I hear you're gonna protect us from One Shot Wren?
Meggy: (Drinks) Yeah... But I didn't ask for this, though...
(Desti stares silently at her, eyes as dead as death...)
Desti: I don't know why they didn't just make me sheriff... (She whips out her revolver.) I reckon I know a thing or two about sharpshootin'-
???: HEY!! What did we say about revolvers in the house?
(...Axol?)
Desti: Aw c'mon, I didn't fire it, Axol!
Axol: Yeah, but it'll get the guests all rowdy! And I don't need that here. (Meggy giggles.)
Desti: Aww, you never let me show my weapon skills around here. Speaking of... It's been a while since we had a lil duel, aye, Meggy?
Meggy: (Finishing her drink) Thanks for the challenge, Desti! But, I better get some rest... Got a big day tomorrow! Have a good night!
(She leaves. Axol and Desti just stare silently...)
Meggy: Hey, Tari! C'mon!. Let's get some shut eye.
(Nothing...)
Meggy: Hello...? Tari?
(Tari is still reading... Except her eyes are tearing up...)
Meggy: Hey... Q-Quit it... Talk to me, Tari!
(Tari's eyes shift over to Desti and Axol.)
Tari: Get out...
Meggy: What???
Tari: GET OUT!!! (She gets up and grabs Meggy by her collar.) MEGGY, PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO GET OUT!!!
(Meggy looks over at Desti and Axol. She finally remembers...)
Meggy: They're... They're meant to be dead...
(Meggy looks around the room. Everyone there are stiff as statues. Tari's eyes glitch out as the world around them begins glitching as well. Tari falls backwards, lifeless. Meggy rushes out towards a white door in the distance as the world continues falling apart. She leaps towards the door...)
Scene 8: Escape[]
(...And wakes up in a hospital room, wearing freaky headgear. She looks around, gets up out of bed, and tries to take the headgear off.)
WARNING
MALFUNCTION
(She finally takes the headgear off.)
Mario: Meggy?
Meggy: Mario!?!
(Mario had just woken up. Meggy runs over to embrace him.)
Meggy: I never thought I'd be so happy to see you! What's going on??
Mario: I don't know! Mario was just in Fun Western Land, then he went to sleep, and now he's here!
(Meggy looks towards a door.)
Meggy: Well... Let's get out of here, first. We'll figure out what's going on later.
(They runs out into the halls and come to two ways.)
Meggy: This way!
(They run right. They keep running through this never-ending labyrinth of a hospital with no exit in sight.)
Mario: Meggy... (He's out of breath.) Mario's tired... These corridors are all the same...
Meggy: Just a little more, man! We're almost out, I can feel it!!
(The duo peek into another hospital room with two beds.)
Mario: Mario's just gonna lie in one of those nice beds. (He enters.)
Meggy: MARIO!! NO!
(Mario lies down on a bed.)
Mario: Nice and comfy!
(Meggy grabs him.)
Meggy: Oh no, you don't! We still gotta get out of here!
(They hear static behind them. They look... A TV displaying "STANDING BY" is on the screen. Beneath it... A familiar symbol.)
Meggy: Hmm... That symbol... I've seen it before...
(The TV displays static.)
Mario: AHHH, IT'S THE GRUDGE!!
(Mario smacks it... And the TV displays Captain Lou Albano doing the Mario. An excited Mario dances along with him. Meggy isn't amused, though.)
Meggy: (Leaves) I'm out of here...
(She looks back, knowing Mario isn't going with her.)
Meggy: MARIO! COME ON!
Mario: C'MON, MEGGY! DO THE MARIO WITH MARIO!!!
(Captain Lou teleports over to another screen.)
Meggy: MARIO! Stop screwing around... Let's GO!
(Lou teleports a few more times, then vanishes.)
Meggy: Okay, he's gone... Now, we can continue-
Mario: (Runs out) COME BACK, SEXY DANCING MAN!!!!
Meggy: HEY!
(She follows him. Lou teleports into a light in the ceiling.)
Meggy: Well... that's... odd...
(Mario once again does the Mario as Lou keeps teleporting form light to light.)
Meggy: Right... I get it now! YEAH! Keep going, Mario!
(The duo keep following Lou (While Mario does the Mario) until they finally reach an exit.)
Meggy: In there! THAT'S THE EXIT!
Mario: Here we go!
(They rush to the door and find...)
Meggy: DAMMIT! This is just another hospital room!
(Lou peaces out.)
Mario: Awww, does this mean no more dancing?
(Meggy slumps on the ground in tears.)
Meggy: It means... we're stuck in here forever!
Mario: Hey! What's this?
(Mario smacks a monitor. Meggy lets her tears flow... Suddenly, the monitor begins displaying static.)
Tari: Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?
Meggy: TARI!?
(Tari comes into view.)
Mario: Hello! (Meggy pushes him to the side.)
Tari: Meggy! Yes! It worked!
Meggy: What worked!? What's going on!?
Tari: The Mario dance! I knew that you guys would follow it.
Meggy: ...that was you? But, you're here?!
Tari: I know it's confusing, but... basically, for the last few weeks, we've all been trapped in... a SIMULATION!
Mario: Oh my God... just another day.
Tari: I'm not really here. We never even made it to the West!
(Flashback begins. Everyone is still on the train, minding their own business.)
Tari: They kidnapped us while we were on the train, and our real bodies were put inside pods hooked up to a big computer.
(Everyone gets knocked out cold and placed in pods with their own freaky headgear. The flashback ends.)
Tari: But I'm used to going into simulations, so eventually, I started seeing right through it.
Meggy: That's my girl! See, it's stuff like this is why I wanted you with me! Okay, now, we just find out who did this and rescue everyone else.
Tari: Actually, I know who did it... and you're not gonna like it, Meggy. It's... ONE SHOT WREN.
(Only unbridled rage fills Meggy as her world around her begins going crazy as she finally acknowledges the truth...)
Mario: MEGGY!??!
(Flashback. As everyone falls on the train floor, the shadow person extends his arm out, revealing himself to be One Shot Wren. Meggy can only grow angrier than ever before...)
Mario: ...M-Meggy?
(Meggy says nothing as she grabs a revolver and rushes out of the room, Mario following her.)
Tari: WAIT, GUYS! THERE'S SOMETHING I HAVE TO TELL- (The door closes before she could say more.)
Scene 9: Confrontation[]
(A armored gate opens, allowing Mario and Meggy to enter the pod room. The two walk down the hallways and into the room.)
Mario: Wh-What the... (looks around) What happened to the hospital hallways?
(Still enraged, Meggy refuses to respond to Mario's question. Soon, the two stop in place, and look at what's in front of them... the former Splatfest champion himself, floating in a large pod with wires attracted to him.)
Meggy: (whips out her revolver) WREEEEEEEEEEENNNNN!!!!!!!
Wren: (slowly opens his eyes, noticing his biggest inspiration's presence) Hello, Meggy...
Meggy: Tell me right now you have an explanation for messing with me and my friends. (breathes heavily) You're my hero! A SplatFest champion! Why would you do this?!
Wren: I was a SplatFest champion...
(Flashbacks begin. Wren wins a SplatFest and becomes the life of a party.)
Wren: I had everything... I had the whole world!
(Wren's team loses another SplatFest. Wren is forced to give up his trophy to the winning team. No one enjoys having him over for parties, either. He eventually loses his home...)
Wren: But the world moved on without me... and I lost everything...
(...and is forced to live in the streets.)
Wren: And for a while... I was lost...
(Until one day, when a mysterious envelope makes it way towards him by a Unknown Somebody. The stamp shows that familiar TV symbol. Wren makes his way to the pod room.)
Wren: ...until one day, when this digital world was gifted to me...
(Wren takes a dive in the large pod and has machinery placed in his body. He gets transported to Western Spaghetti, where he engages in combat.)
Wren: ...a world where I'm always on top! Like a Splatfest that would never end!
(Then Wren steals his beanie back from Meggy and hands it to his three stooges.)
Wren: And as the last SplatFest champion...
(Transitioning over to SMG4: We Interrupt This Broadcast...)
Commercial Narrator: His name is ONE SHOT WREN!
Meggy: NEXT STOP... THE WIIIILD WEST!!!
(Flashbacks end.)
Wren: ...I hoped maybe you'd want to join me.
(Meggy's lips quiver and her eyes tear up. She finally realizes how far down her hero has fallen...)
Meggy: So... you are just a monster. (wipes tears away as she loads her revolver) This... is going to end... NOW!!!
Wren: Come on, Meggy... please don't shoot.
Meggy: I CAN'T BELIEVE I TRUSTED YOU!!!
(BANG!)
(...Wren doesn't get hurt. The bullet falls to the floor like a pin. Meggy drops her revolver as she slowly looks at her hand... It's bloody. She looks down at her shirt. Blood... And a bullet wound on her stomach... She collapses on the floor and begins vomiting blood. Mario watches all of this, a look a sheer horror in his face. The world glitches back to the hotel in Western Spaghetti, and sitting on the porch is the shooter who laid the hit on Meggy, who is revealed to be none other than...)
Wren: (lowers revolver) Told you not to shoot.
Meggy: H-How...?? (Coughs out more blood) H-How did you put us back in the simulation??
Wren: (wheezing with laugher) Oh, Meggy! You never left.
(Meggy rapidly breathes and reaches out, but falls on the floor as she begins losing consciousness, blood flowing from her wounds.)
Mario: MEGGY! (He kneels, terrified for his best friend)
(Wren jumps down from the rail and walks forward to her, glitching from his silmulation form to his real world form.)
Wren: And trust me, Meggy... when I'm done with you, you'll never even WANT to leave. You and I could have something great here! A rivalry that can go on FOREVER! (His head morphs into Desti's.) You of all people should know how important a rivalry is... right? (His head returns to normal.)
Meggy: You... bastard...! (She slowly crawls in pain towards her revolver.) You're nothing like her... her life had a purpose... (She picks the revolver up and point it at Wren.) yours... DOESN'T!
(BANG!)
(The revolver is shot out of her hand. Meggy loses conscience as she painfully grabs her wounded abdomen, looks at Mario one last time, and everything goes black...)
Scene 10: Draw[]
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. She suddenly remembers all the pain she went through and rushes out, grabbing her revolver along the way.)
(Out on the town, everyone is going about their day, almost like nothing happened.)
Meggy: Wh-What's happening!? SMG4! WHERE'S ONE SHOT WREN!?
SMG4: (Hold up Wren's WANTED poster) One Shot Wren is one of the most infamous outlaws in these parts! (He leaves.)
(Swag arrives.)
Meggy: SWAG! YOU'RE BACK! Do you know where One Shot Wren is?
Swag: Wot? I haven't seen that guy in years. And he should consider himself lucky! If I had my hands on him, I'd- (Meggy rushes past him.) Hey!
(Meggy continues running.)
Mario: Hey, Meggy! ...you OK?
Meggy: Oh, thank God... Mario... Please tell me you remember what just happened to us.
Mario: (Holds up a potato) Look! Potato! So good, you can eat them raw!
(Meggy runs away.)
Shroomy: (Arrives) What's up with her?
Mario: Potato racism.
(Meggy continues running until she comes face to face with Wren.)
Wren: Hey, Meggy... Draw.
(She quickly pulls her revolver out, but it's too late. Wren shot first. Meggy falls backwards...)
Scene 11: Infinite Recursion of Time[]
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. She hastily grabs her revolver and leaves. She enters town, where everyone is going about their day, almost like nothing happened.)
Mario: Hey, Meggy- (She runs past him. So he eats a potato.)
(Meggy makes a run for the nearest house, opens the door... And finds Wren.)
Meggy: N-No... NO!!!!
Wren: Draw. (BANG!)
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. She rushes out to hide from Wren, who finds her hiding behind a barrel. He fires.)
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. This time she hides in a wagon.)
(BANG!)
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. She hides behind a desk in the jail.)
(BANG!)
(Meggy wakes up in her room at the hotel. She hides behind a cactus.)
(BANG!)
(Mario eats a potato.)
(Wren shoots Meggy out in the open.)
(Wren shoots her while she's running.)
(Mario takes his mask off to reveal Wren, who shoots her.)
(Meggy is eating potatoes with the Miscellaneous Seven when she gets shot.)
(Try as she might, no matter how good a hiding spot she finds, Wren will always find her as well...)
(Meggy is once again back in her room. Night appears to have fallen. She darts her eyes around and finds Mario eating a potato. Wren pops up at the end of the bed.)
Wren: Draw.
(BANG!)
(The unknown individual that gave Wren the simulation, has gone very too far.)
Scene 12: One Month Later...[]
(Meggy is hiding behind a house, having lost it due to having to put up with Wren for the past month.)
SMG4: Hey, Meggy! I-
Meggy: (Points her revolver) BACK OFF!
SMG4: Whoa! Meggy! What's gotten into you??
(Meggy is now holding SMG4 hostage on top of the building.)
Saiko: MEGGY! STOP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Melony: Please stop! This isn't like you!
Swag: Oi, I'm pretty sure that's illegal!
Meggy: GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!
Tari: Meggy...
(Meggy points the revolver at her.)
Meggy: GET OUT OF MY HEAD! I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN A MONTH!
Tari: ...Meggy... why don't you put down the gun... and we can have a chat? (Meggy fires and misses.)
SMG4: (Panicking) HOLY HELL, MEGGY, HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST IT?!
Tari: Meggy... It's really me.
(Meggy lowers her weapon.)
Tari: Why don't we go have a nice dip by the watering hole to cool off?
Meggy: No. I don't want to. I-
Tari: Meggy... You're going to really want to come with me.
(Left with no choice, Meggy follows Tari. SMG4 celebrates his release by... eating a potato.)
SMG4: So good, you can eat it raw!
Scene 13: The Watering Hole[]
(Meggy follows Tari to the watering hole.)
Meggy (Internally): What are you doing? I-Is this all part of Wren's plan? I don’t trust you... get out of my head!
(Tari shushes her. Meggy inhales, then exhales. Tari goes over to a certain spot and begins counting her steps forward.)
Tari: One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six.
(She looks around. Nobody. She counts to her left.)
Tari: One. Two. Three. Four. Five.
(She stops at a rock.)
Tari: (Gestures for Meggy) Come over here.
(Meggy goes over as Tari lifts the rock up. Underneath is a sort of portal.
Meggy: What... is this?
(Tari steps on the portal and the duo get transported. The rock falls over and covers the portal back up.)
Scene 14: Hope Renewed[]
(They enter a realm of white and light blue.)
Meggy: What... was that?
(Meggy looks before her. All there is is a vast emptiness. Meggy felt fascinated to see this.)
Tari: Welcome to the digital ether! Our little secret oasis inside Wren's messed up west.
Meggy: D-Did you make this all on your own?
(Flashback. Tari prepares to create the ether, but pretends to act like a cowgirl when Wren arrives.)
Tari: Look, I'm Woody! Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy Howdy-
(When he leaves, she continues work.)
Tari: Yea! Well, it was hard, and I had to play dumb the whole time so that Wren wouldn't find out.
(Now Tari is watching Meggy get shot at by Wren.)
Tari: But, I saw what he was doing to you, and I knew I had to keep going.
(Completely shocked of what Wren is doing, she wasted absolutely no time and has to finish up the ether, and she has to do it fast.)
(As Tari thinks on all the times Meggy got shot at, her powers activate more until the ether finally gets created.)
(Flashback ends. Meggy embraces Tari while crying into her shoulder.)
Meggy: (Through tears) Thank you! I'm... I'm so proud of you! I can't believe how much you've grown. (She continues sobbing into Tari's shoulder as Tari returns the embrace.)
Tari: Well... I had some great coaching.
(After a few seconds, they release.)
Tari: We're still not done yet, though. We have to stop Wren and bust everyone out of here.
Meggy: How? He's way too strong... And knows my every move...
Tari: I have a plan.
(She pulls out her revolver. Meggy grins.)
Scene 15: Showdown: Meggy vs. One Shot Wren[]
(Back at Town of Western Spaghetti while Meggy and Tari both "Go Missing". Everyone except for Swag and Chris are being hung. Swag is about to pull a lever.)
Swag: Any last words before it is bye bye time, evil doers?
Mario: Wh-Why are being hung, SMG4?
SMG4: I, wait, I actually don’t know. Do you guys know?
(Everyone shrugs. Swag approaches SMG4.)
Swag: Why? Because!!… Because…
(Swag yeets himself back.)
Swag: Chris, why are we hanging these here vermints?
(Chris shrugs as Wren slides in.)
Wren: Because this is going to make for One Hell of a Show! Now, hurry up and do your job!
(Wren slides out.)
Swag: Alrighty! Looks like it’s Davy Jones locker for you.
Chris: Wrong genre, Swag.
Swag: Whatever. You know what I mean.
(Swag reaches for the lever. Someone shoots at it.)
Swag: gasp!
(It turns out to be… Meggy!)
Meggy: Hello, Swag. I’m afraid I can’t let you do that.
(Swag trembles.)
Swag: I… I…
(Swag swiftly pulls out his gun.)
Swag: Take this!
(Meggy shoots his gun out of his hand.)
Swag: Oh hell no, I don’t get paid enough for this. I'mma head out.
(Swag tries to hang himself. Chris hides behind the platform.)
(Meggy confidently chuckles as she puts her gun down. But she hears Wren, who stands in front of her.)
Wren: Well, looks like someone’s finally learning to play along.
Meggy: Well, I couldn’t let you hang all of my friends, even if we’re just in a simulation.
Wren: I know, and that’s why I love having you here. You can’t quit any more than I can.
Meggy: Oh, I’m quitting something, Wren… I’m quitting this simulation after I take you down!
Wren: (sigh) Well… looks like you still got some learnin’ to do. Eh, fine. I got eternity to teach you anyway.
(They both reach for their guns as they stare at each other dead in the eyes. But it’s taking some time…)
Bob: Just shoot already!
(Meggy shoots. Wren dodges as the bullet goes above him. Wren shoots more. Meggy runs for cover. She shoots twice. Wren dives behind some barrels. Meggy sighs, then aims for the barrels. But Wren isn’t there. She gets shot in the arm. She falls to the floor as she grunt’s looking at the damage. She reaches for the gun.)
Wren: (looking at gun) Pathetic. (stomps on gun) Years of Splatfest training, and you can’t even aim!
Meggy: (cough) Can’t I?
(Wren looks confused.)
Mario: Hey Stinky!
(Everyone is freed. They take off their ropes.)
Mario: Leave Meggy alone!
SMG4: Yeah! We’ll fight you!
(Wren grins.)
Wren: Nice try. But I control the world here.
(He puts up his hands and smiles. Everyone except Meggy and Wren is frozen and standing awkwardly. Meggy trips Wren over.)
Meggy: NOW, TARI!
(Everyone’s eyes turn blue for a second and they turn back to normal. They all look confused.)
Mario: Oww… Mario’s head hurts…
SMG3: It feels like I’ve been asleep for 100 years…
Boopkins: Where are we?
Meggy: Sorry, Wren.
(Meggy leaps and grabs the gun.)
Meggy: Your simulation ends here.
(She points her gun at Wren but he disapeared.)
Meggy: Wren?!
(She looks around in fear as Wren cackles maniacally.)
Wren: YOU IDIOT! YOU THINK YOU’VE WON?!
(Wren stands there as it flashes between him in the tube and in the simulation. He summons an army of familiar enemies in Super Mario.)
Wren: I’ll just reset you all again once I KILL YOU! GET THEM!
(The army shoots guns.)
Swag: OH S***, GET DOWN!
(Saiko runs as Luigi hides. Boopkins, frozen in fear, is grabbed by Luigi. Melony, SMG4 ,3 and Tari get down. Meggy runs. Bob pulls in his blades and brings out two shotguns.)
Bob: It’s Buffalo Bob time!
(He shoots everywhere, taking out enemies. Wren snipes him.)
Bob: Ow, my Western ovaries!
(Bob opens his eyes to see Melony helping him up with a medkit in her right hand. She throws a big plaster on his face. She gives a thumbs up.)
Swag: DIIIIEEEEEEE!
(Saiko shoots by Swag. Luigi and Boopkins watch, hiding.)
Swag: I AM THE LAW!
(Swag ducks for cover. A bunch of enemies are beside Luigi. Luigi’s face is literally flattened.)
Enemies: Yo, wassup!
(They continue shooting as Luigi goes back behind the crate.)
Luigi: GUYS, THERE’S TOO MANY!
(Boopkins pulls out the same gun Tari used in training. Not the first one- the water gun. He jumps on top of the crate.)
Boopkins: I FIGHT FOR MY FRIENDS!
(He leaps.)
Saiko: WHAT?! WAIT BOOPKINS-
Boopkins: SUPER BOOP THE KID ATTACK!
(A cork is shot out. It barely did any damage.)
Boopkins: Uhh, can we be friends?
(Boopkins screams as he is shot behind SMG3, who is holding lit dynamite. He throws it at the crate. The crate explodes as the enemies jump away. They start shooting again. SMG3 and 4 run for cover.)
SMG3: My beautiful dynamite! It’s not working!
SMG4: We need to trick them somehow…
(He gets an idea. He steals 3’s dynamite.)
SMG3: Hey! That’s mine!
(4 puts the dynamite in a potato. He throws it. Enemies are attracted, and you know what they say…)
Enemies: Mmm! So good you can eat it raw!
(They explode. SMG4 and 3 high five. They are both blown up by wren, who has a rocket launcher.)
WREN: You idiots! STOP RUINING MY SCENE!
(The enemies now have rocket launchers.)
Saiko: WHAT?! THEY HAVE ROCKET LAUNCHERS?! BUT THAT’S NOT FAIR-
(Swag and Saiko, Luigi and Boopkins are blown up.)
Meggy: NO! GUYS!
(She runs over.)
Meggy: Oh no!
(Enemies surround her, rocket launcher in hand. Meggy tries to wake them up. Wren walks over.)
Wren: Did you really think you could beat me in my own game?
Mario: STAHP RIGHT THERE!
(Wren looks over.)
Wren: Oh, for f***'s sake…
(Mario stands confidently.)
Wren: What the…
(They both stare. Wren fires his rocket launcher. Mario dodges it with just his head. Wren instead explodes part of his army. The rest of the army and Wren are in shock.)
Enemy: Who… Who are you?
(Mario grins.)
Mario: (Chris Pratt style) It’s-a me, Mario.
(He dances while cowboy music is put on. The rest of the army cheer. Meggy leaps for the gun. She shoots the army away. Wren pulls out his gun, but it is shot out by… Swag?)
Swag: This town ain’t big enough for the both of us... I DID IT! GUYS, I SAID THE LINE! I’M FINALLY COOL!
(While Swag is celebrating, Wren tackles and shakes him.)
Wren: YOU STUPID SHERIFF!
(Meggy cocks a gun at the back of Wren’s head.)
Wren: (gasp)
Meggy: It’s over.
(Wren grins.)
Wren: Well, you finally won.
(A dark shadow casts above Wren’s eyes.)
Wren: Well played. But what’s the plan now… Champion Meggy? I’ll just come back tomorrow, and you’ll all still be stuck here with me…
Meggy/Tari?: I don’t think so.
Wren: What?
(Tari is revealed to be controlling Meggy. She pulls the trigger.)
Scene 16: Simulation Shut-Down[]
(Meggy wakes at the real world where everyone is lying down. She takes off her headgear. Tari’s eyes seem to be glowing. Meggy runs over and take Tari’s headgear off.)
Tari: ...Meggy?
(Meggy hugs Tari in tears, while crying in despair, now permanently traumatized after a month of torture from Wren.)
Meggy: We did it! Good job, partner.
(Tari hugs Meggy, also in tears.)
Tari: Right back at you, partner.
Wren: MEEEGGYYYYY!!!!!
(Tari and Meggy hear Wren's angered voice in the tube.)
Wren: GET BACK HERE! DON'T YOU DARE WALK AWAY FROM ME!YOU WILL NOT LEAVE ME BEHIND!
(As the building begins to collapse, One Shot Wren brings the simulation to reality.)
Tari: QUICK! Get everyone out!
(Tari and Meggy get everyone out. Wren brings one of the goons into reality.)
Meggy: What the...
Tari: WREN, STOP! YOU CAN'T BRING THE SIMULATION INTO THE REAL WORLD! The machinery can’t take it!
(Wren bring more of the goons into reality, and Meggy and Tari free Mario.)
Mario: Hey... Where am I?
(Wren brings the potato goon to reality.)
Potato Goon: S̴͉̝̹̮͗̋̇͂̓̑̑̌͆O̶͖̪̹̫̝̮͕̿̆͐̂̈̓̀́̄͘ ̵̥͚͙̩̻̤̭͓͎̽̌̐̇͂̌͋̓́̂͛̕͠Ģ̴̨̨̧̟͈̹͔̣̩̯̗͕̣̀́͜͠Ô̸̝O̵̡̢̧̮̮͈̺̦͔̲̝̰̗͒̈́̏̅͜ͅḌ̶̡͉̼̬͕̝̝̓̀̂̑̏͜͝ ̶̝̹͙͉̯̗̮̮͇̗̎̏͒͆͆͌̐̎̃̐̓̄̕ͅY̸̨̝̝͕̭̣̩̗̥͎̳͉̓̇͌Õ̸͇̥̯̻̫̜͌̌͘Ǘ̶̻͔͔͖͋̎͝ ̴̛̰͇̲͆̏͌̅̿̔̀̿̑́͜C̴̘̭̟͓̰͎͙͔̗̣̓͑̆͗͒̈́͠A̵̛̰̫̠̺̤̼̣̓̅̌̏̈́͛̕͝ͅN̵̤̐͒̋́͐̕͝͝ ̵̨̡͇̻͕̲̲̬̺̇̓̇͊̔̈́̐̽̅̚̚̚͜͝Ȩ̷̙͙͚̤͙̫̦̺͎̍̓̍̈́͘A̴̯̦͎̝̩̭̝̘͌͒͌̀̒̈́̐͗̿̋̈́́̓̚ͅT̸̢͎͈̩̦͙͈͕̺͇̱̦̰̫̈́̿͒͝ ̴͚̲͚͎̝̦̹͇̅͛͆͐͗͒̓ͅI̶̧͚̰̰̬̜̗̣̽̒́͐͒̒̓̕ͅT̶̢̛͓̳̭̯̣̻̩̤̞̍̋̂̀͂̈́̌̍̈́̌̀͘͜͜ ̵̢̮͈̜̜̹̀́̐͋̓͊́̐̆R̷͓͓̼̠̞͕̩̜̼̣̰͖͚̭̂̋̉Ă̶͎̈́͛͋̓̽̈́͂̾Ẅ̶̺̣̙̝̪̘͕͉̂͝ (Mario screams and runs away from it.)
(As Meggy and Tari free more people from the simulation, Wren brings more of the simulation into reality.)
Meggy: Okay, that’s everyone!
Luigi: What's... going on...?
Tari: NO TIME TO EXPLAIN! HEAD FOR THE EXIT!
(As the building collapses even more, everyone runs and screams for their lives. Meggy wanted to see One Shot Wren one last time.)
Meggy: I wish... I could've been your friend.
Wren: Well... at least you made one hell of a rival...
(As Meggy starts to leave, Wren's smile slowly turned to a frown, and he accepts his fate as the building collapses, but Meggy still has trauma from the event to this day.)
Scene 17: Epilogue[]
(A FEW DAYS LATER...)
(After Meggy went to therapy offscreen, Meggy coaches The Unnamed Child Inkling from the monkey bars.)
Child Inkling: Coach Meggy, Help me! I don't think I can make it!
Meggy: Yes, you can! Just a little further, and you got this!
(The child Inkling then grabs the last bar and smiles. Mario, being the a**hole he is, scared the inkling. She loses grip and falls. But, Tari swiftly catches her. Meggy is glad that she is saved. Mario swoops in and laughs, being hit by Meggy.)
Tari: Wow, you made it all the way to the end! (She gently puts her down) You're getting a lot better!
Child Inkling: Thanks, Miss Tari!
(Meggy blows her whistle.)
Meggy: Alright, that's it for today. Great work everyone!
(The child Inkling runs off happily.)
Tari: Good training today coach! Do we... maybe get to have some game time now?
Meggy: Hell yeah. And I've got just the game too... (She pull out her Splattershot and looks at Mario’s head) Hey Mario... DRAW!
Mario: (Turns around and pulls out two Splattershots) It's high noon... (Shoots at Meggy who dodges and runs off)
Tari: (pulls out her Splattershot) Hey! Wait for me!
(Meggy and Tari are laughing being chased down by Mario. Mario loses them, and gets annihilated from behind the rocks.)
Luigi: I'm so glad we made it all back in one piece.
Boopkins: Yeah, I'm just sad Meggy and Tari didn't find what they wanted on that trip. :(
(Mario shoots Meggy and Tari at the same time and laugh. Meggy and Tari shoot him twice again. Both laugh hysterically.)
Saiko: I think Tari and Meggy found exactly what they were looking for.
SMG4: Yeah... It feels like we're all growing a lot these days. We're learning life lessons, going on crazy adventures... (looking at castle-in-progress) ...and even building a brand new home for ourselves.
Meggy: MARIO!!
Tari: NO!!
(Mario flies and shoots. He bumps into the castle-in-progress and explodes part of it, even when Tari tried to stop him. SMG4 is both shocked and devastated.)
Meggy and Tari: Sorry...
SMG4: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"WESTERN SPAGHETTI" Merch Promo[]
(Luke is dressed as a cowboy.)
Luke: YEEHAW! Thank you guys so, so much for watching the WESTERN SPAGHETTI movie! It has been a blast to work on, and yeah, me and my team had such a weird and fun time making this movie, because of, like, just the spooky parts mixed with the really YEEHAW parts.
Luke: You know, SMG4 was what like 13 years old now, and you know, that's why I find it really important that we keep things fresh and exciting for you guys. And that's why, as you probably may have noticed already, the SMG4 universe has been going through a lot of changes and events this year, including this movie. And so later this year, we have even more different things planned for you guys, like [CENSORED]. So, be sure to keep on watching SMG4 to keep up to date on the SMG4 universe!
Luke: And with that, we have a really exciting announcement to make. To celebrate Tari's new redesign and the release of the WESTERN SPAGHETTI movie, we are releasing the exclusive SMG4 merch line. Yeah! Featuring the official Tari and Meggy animatez! Wow! We got the epic Tari gamer girl in her classic pose and with a duck on her head, for some reason, looking really cool. And you got Meggy in a gun slinging pose, um, about to shoot your face! Um, if you're, if you love being shot in the face, get this animatez now! (Laughter can be heard in the distance.)
Luke: Next, we've got the signed WESTERN SPAGHETTI poster! Put it up! Damn, look how cool that looks! And next, you got these cute little chonks! You got Meggy as an- in her Cowboy outfit, you got Tari in a chonk form, and you got Desti in her chonk form! And you can detach them, and you can make them do whatever you want, you know? It's up to you. And finally, we have the Tari and Meggy collectible pins. Put them up! You can start your collection now, and you know, show them off to your friends. Get this all on sale now for the next 10 days over at smg4.store.
Luke: And with that, again, guys, thank you all so much for watching the WESTERN SPAGHETTI movie. We hope you enjoyed it, and look forward for more...! (He laughs sinisterly, then proceeds to cough.)
The great Cowboy Luke the kid died of tuberculosis in 1988.
(Credits roll, ending the movie and the second chapter on a humorous and wholesome note.)