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| Blooper Information · Gallery · Transcript |
This page is the transcript for Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Charming Peach.
Transcript[]
| [The SM64 title screen appears with "Bloopers! :D" below it] | |
| [Scene cuts to Mario staring at a picture of Peach] | |
| Mario | Sigh.... |
| Mario | Why doesn't Peach like me |
| [Mario exits to the castle main room] | |
| Toad | Hey Mario why do you look all down |
| Mario | Well because Peach doesn't like me at all |
| Toad | Oh.... No big surprise |
| Mario | What do you mean? |
| Toad | Well you are a really bad friend... to everyone |
| Mario | What!? I never did anything bad to Peach |
| Toad | Quite alot actually |
| Mario | Ok smart Toad give me some reasons why I'm a bad friend for Peach |
| Toad | Boy thats too much but ok |
| [Scene cuts to Mario and Peach on a pushcart in a Mario Party minigame] | |
| Toad | (voiceover) Well your too lazy |
| [Everyone begins pushing to move the cart except Mario] | |
| Peach | Mario stop pushing the brakes! |
| Mario | Never! |
| Peach | OMG why did I team up with you |
| Peach | Wait what are you doing don't lean into the- |
| Mario | Weeeee!!!! Too much fun! |
| [The cart goes off the edge, scene cuts to another minigame with statues] | |
| Toad | (voiceover) You never help her |
| [Everyone starts to destroy their statues] | |
| Mario | Oh my team is hopeless |
| [Mario stops and jumps on Peach] | |
| Mario | Jump on Peach!!!! |
| Peach | What the hell Mario help me! |
| [Mario begins helping Luigi and Yoshi destroy their statue] | |
| Mario | I'll help the other team! |
| Mario | This is boring..... Lets beat up Peach!!!!!! |
| [Mario begins punching Peach] | |
| Peach | MARIO!!!!!! |
| [Scene cuts to Mario and Peach trying to blow up a Bowser balloon] | |
| Toad | (voiceover) And your never there for her |
| [Everyone begins blowing up their balloons except Mario] | |
| Peach | Mario why aren't you pumping |
| Luigi | Uhh Peach I think thats a doll of Mario |
| Peach | If thats not him then where is he? |
| [Scene cuts to Mario at a Bowser slot machine] | |
| Mario | Hehe I gambled all of Peach's money on this |
| [Mario loses the slot game] | |
| Mario | Uh oh Peach isn't going to be happy |
| [Scene cuts back to the castle main room] | |
| Toad | You see Mario you-.... |
| Mario | zzzzzz...... Peach is gay |
| Toad | MARIO!!!! |
| [Mario wakes up] | |
| Mario | Whos there! I know karate! |
| Toad | Where you even listening to me? |
| Mario | Was it about Peach dieing then put the celebration music on! |
| Mario | ....Well at least I love Peach |
| Toad | Do you even know what she looks like? |
| Mario | Yeah she's got..... uhhh face and legs and a body.... |
| Toad | OMG you don't even know what she looks like |
| Mario | Yes well maybe..... not a clue |
| Toad | You mistaked everyone for Peach |
| [Scene cuts to Princess Daisy kissing Mario] | |
| Mario | Peach looks very sexier than last time |
| [Scene cuts back to the castle main room, Mario is sliding against the wall] | |
| Mario | Weeeeeeeeeeee! |
| Toad | Thats why-...... |
| Toad | Mario!!!! |
| Mario | Sorry what did you say I wasn't listening |
| Toad | ....Do you want Peach to like you or not? |
| Mario | I'm sorry Toad... Can you please help me to get Peach to like me |
| Toad | Ok fine but this isn't the first time I helped you date girls... well other girls |
| Toad | Anyway just listen to me |
| Mario | Sure.... right after I do this |
| [Mario begins sliding against the wall again] | |
| Mario | You should try this!! Weeeeee! |
| Toad | Ok first of all you have to apologize for everything you have done |
| Mario | I'm good at apologizing |
| [Scene cuts to Mario in Peach's room] | |
| Mario | Peach I got something to apologize to you |
| Peach | Oh and whats that? |
| Mario | Well... I'm sorry for kicking you, sorry for breaking you rare vases, I'm sorry for breaking your MP3! |
| (and more apologies) | |
| Mario | I'm sorry for everything I done in the past |
| Mario | And I'm sorry for having a secret girlfriend!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Peach | ....You did all that and I didn't know about it, you horrible man! |
| [Peach slaps Mario] | |
| Mario | Ow my face!!! |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Mario | So how did I do? |
| Toad | Your suppose to tell the things you done that she knows about!!!!!! |
| Mario | Now you tell me |
| Toad | Anyway to make Peach happy you got to give her a big surprise |
| Mario | Ohhh I got a good surprise! |
| Mario | Infact I got it here right now! |
| [Scene cuts back to Mario in Peach's room] | |
| Mario | Ok here I go |
| Mario | Hey Peach I got a surprise for you |
| Peach | AHHHHHHHHHHH! Get out! Get out!!!!! |
| [Mario exits the room naked] | |
| Mario | Sheesh whats her problem |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Mario | Did I go well? |
| Toad | Uhhh Mario... What was your surprise |
| Mario | I wanted to show my new muscles so I went in naked |
| Toad | Uhhh I don't see the muscles |
| Mario | You don't... Well I thought I had some |
| Toad | Uhhhh try to compliment something about her.... |
| Mario | Oh I have tons of compliments about Peach |
| [Scene cuts back to Mario in Peach's room] | |
| Mario | Peach I like your big head, I like it how you eat so much, I like your fat body, I like how you look old |
| Mario | Peach I like how you suck at Mario Kart and how you get angry in Mario Party |
| Mario | And I like how you suck at everything |
| Peach | You mean little- |
| [Peach shoots Mario] | |
| Mario | .....And I like it how you own alot of guns........ |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room, Mario's head is gone] | |
| Mario | Let me guess.... I did well didn't I? |
| Toad | Uhhh well no.... |
| Toad | You were suppose to compliment on things- oh forget it |
| Toad | Since your failing soo much we will try to give her a present and not a disgusting one! |
| Mario | Ohh I got a good one! |
| Toad | But we should get your head back on first |
| [Scene cuts to the main room, Mario's head is back] | |
| Mario | Ok letsa go! |
| [Mario goes offscreen, Peach screams and slaps Mario, Mario goes back onscreen] | |
| Mario | That didn't go well |
| Toad | What was your present for Peach? |
| Mario | I drew a picture of me for her to remember me by |
| Toad | Let me see |
| [Scene cuts to a horrifically terrible picture of Mario] | |
| Mario | Well I forgot what I look like |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Mario | Oh I'm hopeless... |
| Toad | No your not!... Well maybe |
| Toad | I know, invite Peach to a vacation and go and spend some time with each other |
| Mario | Good idea and I know the perfect vacation |
| (one vacation later) | |
| [Mario enters the castle] | |
| Toad | How was the vacation? |
| Mario | It was pretty fun... for me |
| Mario | Let me tell you how it went... |
| [Scene cuts to Mario, Peach, Luigi and Yoshi on a boat crashing into a Bowser rock] | |
| Mario | (voiceover) Well first our boat hit a rock that mysteriously reminds me of Yoshi |
| [Scene cuts to a Mario Party minigame with bombs] | |
| Mario | Then we started throwing bombs at Peach |
| Mario | Boy that was fun because Peach nearly died |
| [Scene cuts to another minigame with hammers and lightbulbs] | |
| Mario | Then I started killing everyone with a hammer, but I just aimed for Peach |
| [Scene cuts to another minigame involving stealing items from bags] | |
| Mario | Then we played a game where we have to hump each persons bag but we all aimed for Peach |
| [Scene cuts to Mario, Peach, Luigi, and Yoshi in a pipe] | |
| Mario | On the way home I was too heavy for the pipe so it well broke |
| [The pipe tilts and all the characters fall, scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Toad | (facepalm) You did stuff that made Peach angry... |
| Mario | But it was fun |
| Toad | Ok lets try this again... Put Peach in a situation then you save her then she'll know how a good man you are |
| Mario | Good idea! |
| Toad | But I'm going to tell you what to do so you don't mess it up |
| Toad | You better not mess this up |
| [Scene cuts to Mario and Peach in a desert] | |
| Mario | Ok Peach can you please stand on the train tracks |
| Peach | Ok? |
| [Peach moves onto the tracks] | |
| Mario | I'm going to go take a whiz you stay there |
| [Mario moves away from the tracks] | |
| Mario | Hehehe |
| Peach | ????? |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Mario | That was a good whiz |
| Toad | MARIO! |
| Toad | You were suppose to push Peach of the train tracks |
| Mario | Uh oh |
| [Scene cuts to Peach being hit by the train] | |
| Peach | WHAT THE HELL MARIO! |
| [Scene cuts back to the main room] | |
| Mario | I'm sure she's ok |
| Toad | Well Mario its impossible for a person to like you |
| Mario | Can I have one more chance |
| Toad | Ok go do what ever you want with Peach, whatever that'll make you happy |
| Mario | There's only one thing to do, actually |
| Toad | Whats that? |
| Mario | You just wait |
| [Mario goes offscreen and shoots Luigi] | |
| Toad | Wow what the hell |
| [Mario goes back onscreen] | |
| Mario | Ok I'm good |
| Toad | What did you do? |
| Mario | I killed Luigi because he made the vacation suck |
| Mario | Well I learnt my lesson Toad, that Peach sucks and now I'm going to go date Daisy |
| Mario | Though she hates me can you help me get her to like me Toad? |
| [Scene cuts to Mario and Peach outside the castle, "THANKS FOR WATCHING" appears] | |
| Mario | Peach don't you like pancakes |
| Mario | Peach? |
| [Mario picks up Peach] | |
| Mario | Fine be that way! |
| [Mario throws Peach into the lake] | |
| End of transcript |