Episode Information · Gallery · Transcript
| Blooper Information · Gallery · Transcript |
This page is the transcript for Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Crystal Funhouse.
Transcript[]
(Title screen shows SuperMarioGlitchy4 Presents in pixelated letters)
(Shovel noises are heard, as a shovel and a hole are centered in the scene.)
Lakitu: this hole looks legit...
(Turns out, the scene is centered around several people searching inside a mine in hopes of finding gold.)
Nintendofan997: you guys sure this is going to work?
SMG4: of course! Have I ever let you down?...
X: yes all the time
MCGustavo: X there is bound to be gold somewhere in this mine!
FightingMario54321: but we've been here for 2 hours and all we have found are rocks
EpicYoshiFan: uhh guys... we're running out of space to put these rocks with faces. and one is wearing a hat
Ruffman8890: hey what happens if someone finds out about this?
SMG4: don't worry Mario and Luigi are guarding the entrance
(Mario is seen having a lightsaber duel with Luigi, with Mario wearing a Darth Vader mask)
Mario: join the dark side! we have spaghagetii!
Metal Mario: WHAT THE HELL!!!??!? GET OUT OF MY APARTMENT!!! DID YOU TOUCH MY ROCK COLLECTION!
Ruffman8890: uhh guys we have a problem
Metal Mario: you stupid jews! I'm coming to rape you all!
Ruffman8890: How do we get rid of him?
(SMG4 begins to throw a rock at Metal Mario)
Metal Mario: WHY AM I SCREAMING AT THE WALL!?!
(The rock misses and Metal Mario notices, prompting him to chase the rock)
Metal Mario: MY ROCK COLLECTION!!!!!
X: I wonder how much rocks he own and are you done yet?
SMG4: I CAN'T! this banana won't dig!
Ruffman8890: stand aside! let the pro do it! OPEN SESAME!
(He fails)
MCGustavo: well that doesn't work. let me do this!
(Begins to utilize pickaxe to dig, but accidentally throws it)
MCGustavo: AHHHHHHHHHH!....oops
Metal Mario: HEY! NEVER throw my rock collection!
(Pickaxe ends up hitting Metal Mario in the face)
Metal Mario: OW! now your throwing pixelated axes? weirdest hobos I have ever seen!
FM:....(Notices button that readspress and I cut you! > :( )uhh have you ever notice this button guys?....oh well I'll press it anyway
(Wall opens to reveal a secret room)
SMG4: OMG! a button that moves walls! we're all going to die!
X: I can't look! what's inside?
EpicYoshiFan: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
X: WHAT WHAT!?
EpicYoshiFan: oh wait don;t worry it's just bowser's mum! :D hi ms kooper...you know I think she's dead
Ruffman8890: Soo what do you think is in there?
SMG4: diamonds! trasure! a hobo to play with! Well I'll go first (Enters the room) .....well its really black in here...
X: well this isn't so bad...OMG what the hell is that!?
(Reveals it's just a Toad (species)
MCGustavo: its just a hobo! what's with you and hobos?
Toad (species): hey! shut up!
FM: I got a bad feeling about this
Ruffman8890: yeah I think I left the n64 back at the castle
SMG4: there's nothing here!..the only thing here is - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
X: SMG4! wait for me!
MCGustavo, Ruffman8890, and EpicYoshiFan: GUYS! WAIT FOR US!!!
SMG4: AHHHHHHHHHHHH! why am I still falling?
X: I think we have fallen into a bottomless pitfall
FM: oh god! when are we going to land!?
MCGustavo: I THINK I WET MY PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(RM and EPY are playing Ping Pong while they are falling)
Ruffman8890: SUCK MY PING PONG!
EpicYoshiFan: >:D I'M THE POKEMON MASTER AT THIS GAME!!!!
X: guys! really? at a time like this?
RM: hey! they don't pay me enough to do this! SCORE!
SMG4: wait guys I think I see light!
(Everyone falls to the ground, lava nearby.)
RM: oh yeah! I pwn at ping pong
SMG4: where are we anyway?
X: wow! this must be a hidden sancturary! look at these ancient writing!
SMG4:...ancient people liked cuks!
X: I'm feeling a powerful and weird feeling....
MCGustavo: ...uh I think that was me
RM: uh oh...so this place isn't the bathroom?
FM: I can decipher this stone...it says "your mother is gay" >:( my mum is a guy!?
RM: Hey guys look at this cool stone!
FM: wow! stop right there! you don't know what this stone can do!
SMG4: which is why you use old people!
Old Man Hobo: ......weird this stone has a weird feeling..like my butt
SMG4: .....yep I think this crystal is safe
X: ok everyone be careful we might not know what this stone can do! and ....SMG4! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
SMG4: (Is eating the crystal) this doesn't taste like marshmellows!
RM: Everyone touch the crystal!
MCGustavo: wow this crystal...I'M FEELING THIS POWERFUL URGE!...TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!
EpicYoshiFan: ...this is starting to become gay...
X: wait why is the crystal starting to glow?
(Crystal begins to glow and expand light)
SMG4: :D see guys crystals won't kill you
X: but why is the crystal....
MCG: AHHHHHHHHHH! MUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEE!
(Light begins to turn the colors into reverse)
...meanwhile....
Luigi: do you think we should check on smg4 and the others? they hadn;t yelled at us yet!
Mario: nahh, lets play star wars! I'm bags playing the black guy!
Luigi: don't you mean darth-....(Gets impaled by lightsaber) ow...
SMG4: .........ohhhh my hat. huh? where am i?......hello? ANYONE! oh this is not good, I think I peed on the crystal stone. X! there you are! you ok?
X: yeah but I don't know where the others are
(The other four Multicolored Marios are playing poker, gambling with chips)
EpicYoshiFan: >:D I win again!
RM: hey shut up! I'm better at ping pong!
SMG4: guys! why are you playing poker we need to get out of this place!
MCG: we're going to die anyway
FM: we don't even know how to get out!
(Lights turn back on, turning a dark atmosphere into a bright one)
X: yes! everything is back to normal!.....I think
SMG4: hey who is that!?
(A figure in black is on top of Peach's Castle
RM: is that my dad? cause he likes dancing naked on roofs
SMG4: HEY SIR! or MAM OR HOBO DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON?
The figure is revealed to be SMG3
SMG3: I mean yes I do know what's going on >:)
SMG4: SMG3! THE GUY WHO STOLE MY WALLET IN THE BATHROOM!!!! oh wait that was mario, THEN SMG3! MY DOPPLE?
SMG3: yes it is I! since the last video I wanted revenge! so I used the crystal to trick you and trap you in a nightmare that I control!
EPY: lol thats right you failed at twisters!
FM: we can beat you up easily!
SMG3: oh I wouldn't do that, since I control your minds!
X: oh yeah!?
SMG3: >:D hehe (evilly laughs)
(Distorts The Mushroom Kingdom into a negative color and begins to warp reality into their nightmares)
SMG4: huh! what's happening!? and why do you sound like bowser when he drinks beer? huh? OH COME ON! not another black room!
X: smg4 what's going on?
MCG: we're all going to die!
RM: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! big gay dance! (Sees three Luigis dancing)
SMG4 and X: OMG! (Sees Mario dressed in a bra and underwear) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Mario (vision): you know you want these ohhhhh yeahhhhhhhh in my next video I'll be fully naked!
SMG4: KILL ME! KILL ME!
X: MY EYES THEY BURN!!!
???: hey! remember me! >:D THE Crazy Toilet Dude!?
FM: ahh poop
(Toilet is thrown at FM while he screams in horror. MCG is running from The Haunted Carpenter.)
SMG4: You have your gun?
(X and SMG4 are surrounded by an army of Zombies)
X: no mario stole it! I think of a plan!
SMG4: uhh...doritos?
Bot: guys! remember me? bot? operation gay?
X: oh no not you!
(Bot is revealed to lead the army of dancing Luigis)
Bot: don't worry we just want to "play!"
RM: what are you gay?
EPY: I'm not santa!!! (Chased by Santa Claus in a motercycle
RM: why can't I win this!!? (Plays Pong with a Gourmet Guy and is losing 0-90)
Gourmet Guy: I'm not even trying
(EPY is being chased by Ronald McDonald)
SMG3 (in a screen while Nyan Cat and various other objects are appearing behind him): I'm not crazy! you calling me crazy? its not like I steal magic rocks and lose at twister for a living hahahahahahahhahaha
SMG4: your not going to get away with this!!! we're going to tell your mum!
SMG3: MY MUM?! OK THATS IT YOUR GETTING!
Transports to different room
SMG4: huh? where are we now? (please be peaches bedroom)
(Roar echoes across room)
SMG4: ahhh! the forgotten door!
X: what's so weird about this door?
SMG3: its suppose to look scary!
EPY: ok who here wants to open the door?
FM: why is everyone looking at me? fine but don't touch my body if I die. ok here I go
RuffMan: WHATCHOUT YOUR GOING TO-......uhh just testing the shout before you die
FM: thank you, ok I need to concentrate and....
(opens door and reveals pair of red glaring eyes and unusual breathing. Meanwhile, Mario is on the top of Peach's Castle still roleplaying as Darth Vader)
Mario: YOU WILL NEVER DESTROY MY KINGDOM! LUIGI GAYWALKER!
Luigi: I'm going to destroy your hobo castle of doom! if you don't come down from there! me and my sidekick robbinhood will destroy you!
Toad: yeah and go team gay!
Mario: then eat this red glowing stick!
(throws lightsaber at Luigi but misses)
Luigi: uh-oh
Toad: your lucky my head afro is fake!
???: they must be that way (Two other Multicolored Marios enter the scene, one with light green attire and won with yellow and blue attire)
Luigi: huh? who are you guys?
Mario: argh! gay pirates on the pork bow! attack!
(throws lightsaber at ??? but lightsaber gets deflected towards Mario)
Mario: wow! karate pirates! well you'll never touch my booty!
Luigi: please don't hurt me I'm not a nazi!
???: we're not here for you, and if we were then you'll be dead already
Mario: oh acting cool!? well I'm a black guy so I'm cool!
(Both Multicolored Marios nod)
(Both Multicolored Marios nod again)
Narrator: screw this job
RM: so what's in there?
FM: I dunno there are just glowing eyes! hey! come out! we come in peace
(The glowing eyes disappear)
SMG4: perfect you scared it, this is why you don't let old people go near children!
(A girl comes out)
SMG4: OMG! CHINESE KID KILL IT KILL IT!!!
EPY: ok everyone just calm down! I have bazooka!
FM: hello little girl, what's your name
Girl:.......YOUR MOM!
MCG: my mom? sounds familiar
FM: Wait what?
Girl: (Starts madly cursing)
Narrator: we are experiencing technical difficulties)
RM: ....That's normal
(reveals to be The Haunted Carpenter)
The Haunted Carpenter: HI GUYS! you all know your best friend right? the haunted carpenter? HUI DO YA?
(The group gives various guesses in unison)
SMG4: mental patient?
FM: gay dude?
MCG: That hobo!
X: Mario's dad?
RM: no
Lakitu: I'm going to take a guess....MUM?
The Haunted Carpenter: I'm some haunted dude with a weird eye ok? NOW PREPARE TO DIE!!!
SMG4: why does everyone we meet want to kill us?
The Haunted Carpenter: and when I kill you we will all play skyrim!
???: PAUNCH!
X: THANK YOU! finally somebody does it!
The Haunted Carpenter: ok who did that, I have a 10 dollar pedicure! cmon I'm not going to hurt you when your dead
(Two of the unknown Multicolored Marios we saw earlier begin throwing punches at the Haunted Carpenter, then beating him up)
The Haunted Carpenter: can you guys please stop!? my eyeball is going to fall out again! OW OW OW OW WO WO!!! WEEEEE look at me spin :D i mean OW OW O W OW OW!!!! wait no NO! (Gets punched to the room where he came from) fine! I'll stay in my room! jesus christ, now my arm fell off thanks a lot!
SMG4: that....was....AWESOME! do it again!
X: wow they are good fighters! better than you FM
FM: HEY! shut up!
EPY: who...who are you?
???: you can call us anonymous
AustinDawgyDawg: but thats a gay name, my name is Austin dawgydawg and his name is GageDawg. we could hear someone scream from the whole mushroom kingdom, so we came
SMG4: hehe why is everyone looking at me....
GageDawg: now we need to save you guys from that weird dude, the guy who keeps saying he's not crazy and who keeps a pet rock with him
SMG4: ugh he's sorta like my brother, cmon! lets go find him!
(At the Mushroom Kingdom)
Luigi: any last words before I destroy you Darth Vader?
Mario: yeah! get some tic tacs! and also LUIGI! I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!... and ur gay ut gay ur gay ur gay lolololololololol
SMG4: so uuhh how do we find SMG3?
ADD: well we...I have no idea
GD: YOU DON'T HAVE A PLAN!> ok we're screwed
(SMG3 is seen kissing a poster of Justin Bieber in a screen)
SMG3: HEY! don't you turn on the camera without permission? anyway! YOU WILL NEVER ESCAPE MY LAIR!!! guards! attack!! and I'll be in the restroom if you can find me!
MCG: what kind of guards now? his mum?
Robotic Marios: destroy destroy the boss commanded us to destroy you!
X: hey robots! how much chuck would a wood chuck chuck if a would chuck could chuck wood?
Robotic Mario: .........10?
X: no 2 since its arm was broken!
Robotic Marios: what the feeueeaaeaueauauafuufa (Begins to get distracted)
RM: lol idiot bots now lets get to smg3!
(In a restroom, the gang has caught SMG3)
SMG3: ohh new barbie dolls for sale :3 ohh justin beiber poster! even though I already have 20 - AHHHH! don;t you guys knock!?.....what?...oh right...the nightmares
(Gang begins beating him up)
SMG3: ow no NO NOT THERE! OWOWOWOOWO!
FM: so what do you think they're doing in there?
RM:....I don't want to know!
GD: NOW! GET US OUT OF THIS NIGHTMARE!
ADD: yeah or you'll be swimmin with the magikarps!
SMG3: ok ok! I'll get you guys out of here! just don't give me another wedgee. Nightmare be gone or I'll kill your moms!
(Gang is transported out)
SMG4: hey thanks ADD and GD for beating up that bieber fan!
ADD and GD: we're here to help :D
MCG: I wonder what Mario and Luigi are doing? missing out on all the fun
(Luigi has defeated Mario in their roleplaying game)
Mario: ok luigi you win...you can be the black guy....
Luigi: no! I like being gaywalker! and you suck at being the darth vader!
Mario: FINE! THIS IS WAR!!!!
(Title cards showsEND> O_o)