Episode Information · Gallery · Transcript
| Blooper Information · Gallery · Transcript |
This page is the transcript for Super Mario 64 Bloopers: Toad Gold.
Transcript[]
| (The blooper begins outside the castle) | |
| Narrator | Ahh it was a beautiful day in the Mushroom Kingdom |
| Mario | (flies in front of the screen while A-posing) (AHEHEHEH) |
| Narrator | Eh hem as I was saying! Everyone was having a good time |
| Mario | (flies in front of the screen again) (AHEHEHEHEHEH) |
| Narrator | >:I EVRYONE WAS HAVING A GOOD TIME! |
| Mario | (flies in front of the screen again) (AHEHEHEHEHEH) |
| Narrator | Oh forget it |
| Mario | (flies toward the castle) (AHEHEHEHEHEHEH AHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH) |
| (Cut to the main room of Peach's Castle, where Toad is standing) | |
| Toad | :( Why do I have such a boring life.... |
| Toad | Standing in this spot 24/7 |
| Toad | I wish something big would happen |
| Mario | (hovers around the room while A-posing) (Mario gibberish) |
| Toad | ...I'm going to take a stroll... |
| (Cut to the castle exterior) | |
| Mario | (flies across the screen) (AHAHAHAHAHAHA!) |
| Toad | (exits the castle) ...Stubby legs |
| Toad | And why is Mario acting so weird? |
| Mario | (flies across the screen, while A-posing, upside down and naked) (AAAAALBLBLBLBLBLBL) |
| Toad | (continues walking away from the castle) Oh well |
| Toad | Sigh being in a game sucks |
| Toad | Even better I feel like killing myself |
| Toad | If I owned a knife |
| Toad | (standing still) ... |
| Mario | (runs backwards, naked, into Toad) I:D (BLBLBLBLBLA) |
| Toad | (propelled toward a hole) Wow! Mario!? |
| Toad | (falls into hole) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! |
| Toad | (lands at the bottom) (AWAWAWAF***!) OW MY FUNGUS! |
| Toad | Jesus Christ where am I? |
| Toad | ...and why was there a hole there in the first place |
| Toad | (approaches a glow) Whats that glow? |
| Toad | Is that what I think it is? |
| (The camera shifts to show a pile of gold bars) | |
| Toad | :D!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OVER 988888888888888888899999999999993113234354356363774747534 carrot gold... wow |
| Toad | I'm A RICH TURD! Err TOAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Toad | But what will I do with all this dough?... |
| (Cut back to outside the hole) | |
| Mario | (still naked, approaching the hole) Oh thank god Peach finally got a toilet! |
| Mario | (bends over the hole) (ungodly amount of flatulence) Ooohhh nasty! |
| Toad | (offscreen) AHHHHHHHHHHHH! |
| (Cut back to inside the hole) | |
| Toad | (covered in poop) Well at least I got gold... O: I think I ate some! |
| (Cut back to the castle exterior, Toad has left the hole) | |
| Mario | Eww Toad you smell like Wario! |
| Toad | Shut up I'm rich now! |
| Mario | You! RICH! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (laughing) |
| Toad | (leaves) |
| Toad | Lakitu have you seen Peach? |
| Lakitu | Shes up there |
| Peach | (sliding down an invisible tree) Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! |
| Toad | Peach can I ask you something? |
| Mario | (appears onscreen) Haha your rich HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (laughing) |
| Peach | What? |
| Toad | Can I buy the castle from you? |
| Peach | How much you got? |
| Toad | Oohh like about OVER 988888888888888888899999999999993113234354356363774747534 carrot gold |
| Peach | I'll just take 10 bucks |
| Toad | Really? 10 bucks? For a castle? |
| Peach | Yeah what do you think you are? Rich? |
| Mario | (comes onscreen again) RICH! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (laughing) |
| Toad | Well ok then (gives Peach a $10 bill) |
| Screen Text | You recieved 10 bucks! |
| Screen Text | You idiot you could of been OVER 988888888888888888899999999999993113234354356363774747534 richer! |
| Peach | Shut up mind |
| Toad | So this is my castle now! |
| Toad | But what should I do first? |
| Toad | Hmmm |
| (The screen shifts to show Mario talking to Luigi, SMG4, and X) | |
| Mario | And he said he was rich! |
| Luigi, SMG4, X | RICH!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (laughing) |
| Toad | Hey guys! Get off my property! |
| Mario | Huh? Your rich? |
| Toad | No I own the castle now and I'm kicking you guys out! |
| X | You can't just kick us out!!! |
| SMG4 | Yeah what did we do to you? |
| Toad | Boss me around make fun of me, harass me and thinking its funny because I'm rich! |
| Mario | Oh yeah good times |
| Toad | Yeah goo- GET OFF MY PROPERTY!!!!! |
| All | *groan* |
| Mario | Hey can I call u Old Man Toad? |
| Toad | NO! Now get off! |
| (Cut to a town where Mario, Luigi, SMG4 and X are meeting) | |
| SMG4 | OK! We are here for the meeting of Club Backstab Toad! |
| Luigi, X | YEAH!!! |
| SMG4 | But first where the hell is Mario? |
| Mario | (next to a flag depicting a Toad with a knife in its back) Hey guys do you like the new flag for Club Backstab Toad? |
| Luigi | Yeah! It really shows the name of the club! |
| SMG4 | Ok now that we're all together we need to devise a plan to stop Old Man Toad! |
| SMG4 | So anyone got a plan? |
| Mario | Oohh! Ooohhh pick me! |
| SMG4 | Nope no one? |
| Mario | (with a giant hand) ARE YOU BLIND I GOT MY DAMN HAND IN THE AIR! |
| SMG4 | Mario |
| Mario | Ok I devised a plan for what we should do |
| Mario | I diagramed it... wait... Its stuck in my underwear... |
| (Cut to a badly-made drawing titled "Mario's Plan :3") | |
| Mario | Ok so I'm on the very right SMG4 your the unhappy guy and Luigi is the midgit |
| Luigi | Why am I small? |
| Mario | Cause you are |
| Mario | So we start out side the castle |
| Mario | X you ride a giant fire breathing duck! I get a light saber and SMG4 gets a bomb |
| Luigi | How about me? |
| Mario | Well you can record it |
| Mario | Then we break in killing Toad! And thats my plan |
| Luigi | Why am I on the toilet? |
| Mario | Cause you are |
| (Cut back to the town) | |
| Mario | Did you like it? |
| X | Where the hell are we going to get a giant fire breathing duck? |
| SMG4 | And a light saber? |
| Luigi | Why am I small :( |
| SMG4 | Lets just go to the castle and break in |
| (Cut to the castle exterior, Mario and Luigi approach the castle to the tune of "Eye of the Tiger") | |
| SMG4 | Hurry up! Walk faster! |
| Mario | Hey! I just wanted to walk in style! |
| Security Bot | Hey who are you to? |
| Mario | The real question is WHO ARE YOU? |
| Security Bot | Security guard now Toad said that I cannot let you in |
| Mario | Well Toad doesn't know my sad story..... |
| Mario | You see... When I was 5 I was ran over.... by a stroller..... |
| Mario | I had to get plastic surgery.... |
| Mario | And thats how I got permanent brain damage.... |
| Mario | *sniff* and mama and papa abanedend me........ |
| Mario | And nobody ever liked me.... |
| Luigi | *sniff* Really?...... Thats so sad :*( |
| Luigi | WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! |
| Security Bot | That was sad |
| Security Bot | But I still can't let you guys in |
| Mario | (Doh! F***!) |
| X | Did it work? |
| Mario | No it didn't work |
| SMG4 | Was that sad story true? |
| Luigi | That actually happned to Mario's BROTHER |
| SMG4 | Rigggghht lets move to plan B |
| Mario | (Approaches the castle doors) .......... |
| Security Bot | What? |
| Mario | Look into my eyes.... |
| (The camera zooms in on Mario and the colors change) | |
| Mario | Your getting dizzy |
| Security Bot | I'm getting dizzy.... |
| Mario | When I count to 3 you will do something really nice... |
| Mario | 1...... 2...... Uhh what comes after 2?.... Oh! 3! |
| Security Bot | I will do something nice... |
| Mario | Yes yes do something nice! |
| (The security guard punches Mario) | |
| Mario | (Urgh! Mamaf***er!) |
| X | Hey why don't we just take the basement door! |
| (The camera shifts to the basement door, which is blocked by more guards) | |
| Security Bot | Don't even think about it |
| X | D: |
| SMG4 | Why didn't I think of it sooner the Black Room of Death!!!!!!!! |
| Mario | Yeah good idea no one ever has lunch there! |
| SMG4 | (performs the Black Room of Death glitch) Haha! |
| SMG4 | Yes made it! |
| SMG4 | We can get in now! |
| (The camera shifts to show a guard in the Black Room) | |
| Security Bot | I don't think so! |
| (Cut back outside the castle) | |
| Security Bot | (offscreen) And stay out! (throws SMG4 away from the castle) |
| SMG4 | Hey I had OVER 988888888888888888899999999999993113234354356363774747534 gold bars to! |
| SMG4 | Aww |
| (Cut to Mario on the roof of the castle) | |
| Mario | (ground pounding) I want to go back in the castle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| SMG4 | Mario are you trying to break a hole in the roof again? |
| Mario | Well how else are we going to get into the castle? |
| SMG4 | RAGE! RAWWWWWWR! (starts ground pounding) |
| X | RAWR! |
| Luigi | Quack quack |
| Mario | Thats not raging! |
| Luigi | You guys got to be dinosaurs I wanted to be a duck |
| SMG4 | Hey Yoshi! I wanted to give you a gift |
| Yoshi | Yay! Is it drugs!? |
| SMG4 | Oh you'll find out (gives gift) |
| X | Why did you do that for? |
| SMG4 | Don't worry it was a rage present |
| (explosion) | |
| Luigi | Uhh I think we blew a hole in the roof... |
| Mario | How about Yoshi? |
| (The screen shifts to show Yoshi's skeleton) | |
| Luigi | Oh he'll be alright... I think |
| (Cut to the castle's main room) | |
| Mario | (lands inside the room) Ow! my fat! |
| X | Looks like Toad didn't make much changes |
| Toad | (wearing a crown) Hey! What are you doing in my castle! |
| Toad | This is meh castlesz and do onez can haxorz its! |
| Mario | OLD MAN TOAD! THIS IS OUTRAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Mario | Did you move the refrigerator somewhere else? Cause I'm starving! |
| Toad | Ok let me tell you how I own this castle |
| Toad | When a Toad mum and Toad dad |
| Toad | love each other very much they decide to |
| Toad | (offscreen) (blah blah blah) |
| Mario | (does secret head shake) |
| Luigi | (does secret head shake) |
| SMG4 | (does secret head shake) |
| X | (does secret head shake) |
| Mario | (holding machine gun) READY! |
| Luigi | (holding machine gun) AIM! (Why do I get the midgit gun?) |
| SMG4 | (holding machine gun) FIRE IN! |
| X | (holding bazooka) DA HOOOOOOOLE! |
| (Cut to the castle exterior as gunfire is heard, then back inside) | |
| X | WHERE THE HELL ARE WE AIMING AT?! |
| Mario | I DUNNO! |
| Toad | (runs toward a room) O gawd get out of here! |
| Luigi | (flying around the room) HELLLLLLLLLLLLLP! I'm out of control!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| SMG4 | This is making me dizzy.... |
| Luigi | (falls back to the ground) Sorry about that......... |
| Luigi | Now is every one ok? |
| (The screen shifts to show SMG4, X, and Mario without his head) | |
| All | Yep |
| (The screen shifts to show a crack in the ceiling, then the gold falls into the main room) | |
| SMG4 | Wow! Look at all that dough!!!!!!!!!! |
| Mario | OMG! Lag! |
| Mario | PROFIT! |
| Toad | HEY! THATS MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Toad | My.... |
| Toad | PRECIOUS! |
| X | Oh lord he really needs some Tic Tacs |
| Luigi | (blubbering) Mario I think we should just leave the gold..... |
| Mario | What and waste a oppertunity like |
| Mario | (accidentally fires the gun) WHOOPS! WATCHOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Toad | Stop shooting the gold!!!!!!!!! |
| (The ground under the gold begins to crack) | |
| Mario | (stops firing) Uh-oh |
| Toad | Noooooooooo! Meh GOLD! |
| (The gold begins falling into a pit) | |
| Toad | NO! They were so young D:> |
| Mario | But I guess they're going to someother world now |
| (Cut back to the main room, the pit "burps" after all the gold finishes falling into it) | |
| Toad | My gold... Its... gone.... |
| Toad | D: |
| Mario | Even worse who's going to pay to fix all this? |
| SMG4 | I got to go and make some... bloopers... See ya! (leaves) |
| Luigi | Yeah I'm going to suck some ghosts.... (leaves) |
| X | Going to kill some zombies (leaves) |
| Mario | Guess your on your own I got to go recover gems (leaves) |
| Toad | ....What to do now... |
| Toad | (jumps into the pit) I WANT THE GOLLLLLDDDD!!!!!!!!!! (AHHHHHHHHHHHH!) |
| (Fade to black) | |
| Screen Text | THX FOR WATCHING |
| (Sound of Toad crashing into the bottom of the pit) | |
| End of transcript |