Episode Information · Gallery · Transcript
| Blooper Information · Gallery · Transcript |
Opening[]
(An upset Waluigi is walking down a road. He turns and gets hit by Wario driving a car, Daisy sitting in the seat next to him, surprised at Wario's actions. Wario, meanwhile....)
Wario: I WON! I won I won! I won I-
(It turns out this was a dream Wario was telling Waluigi about.)
(Two hours later, at the Wario Bros. residence, Wario runs up to Waluigi, who was looking at a poster of a shirtless, buff guy. Wario reveals he has a treasure map he found... Or to be more precise, an ultra legit treasure map he bought off eBay for five dollars.)
Waluigi: (Falls backwards in disbelief) Stupid...
Scene 1[]
The two idiots set out to find their treasure. They searched long and hard, overcoming obstacles. And soon enough, they found their destination...
Wario: Yeah!
(...A bathroom.)
Wario: Ah, f*ck...
(...Which Mario just got done using.)
Mario: Hello!
(Wario and Waluigi freak out at the naked Mario.)
(Later, as Wario tries to figure out what to do next, Waluigi mockingly laughs at him. Of course, this only sets Wario off.)
Wario: You little sh!t...!
(Wario begins to attack Waluigi. Suddenly, he stops after noticing the map has been snatched by a shadow being. He walks over to where the map once laid.)
Wario: (Peeking around a corner) Somebody cheated...
(He spots the shadow being and gives chase, Waluigi following not to far behind... At first. Until he trips. They eventually chase the being into an alley. The shadow thief goes down a warp pipe. The brothers follow.)
Scene 2[]
(Waluigi wakes up on a small island to find his face being squashed by Wario's rear end. He quickly crawls away as Wario brings up the treasure. Waluigi groans in the fact that without the map, they're going to have to find the treasure themselves.)
(Their first stop is Europe. They find themselves at the foot of a large tree. Wario crosses a tree bridge and finds a coin. And it's love at first sight.)
Wario: Oooooh yeeeeah...!
(Waluigi, hearing strange noises, goes to see what's going on. Seeing Wario in love with a coin, Waluigi loses his patience, since they have a treasure to find.)
Waluigi: Oh, come on...
(Eventually, they crosse the bridge.)
Wario: F*ck yeah!
(Suddenly, Donkey Kong blocks their way.)
Donkey Kong: NO ONE TOUCHES MY TREASURES!
Wario: Who do you think you are, buster?
Waluigi: Wah, this looks to easy.
(DK makes this harder by pulling out a pistol and making the brothers run back where they came from. Waluigi jumps over the river with ease, but Wario falls short and takes a dive ad DK starts firing. Waluigi, looking for cover, hides behind a Bob-Omb... Which was a dumb idea, as DK shot it once and it went kaboom. Meanwhile, Wario is being eaten by a large fish.)
(After getting back on dry land, Wario, still with the fish on his head, spots Waluigi's charcoal black body.)
Wario: Ah, f***...
(DK has now pulled out a shotgun. Wario has an idea...)
Wario: WALUIGI LAUNCHER!
Waluigi: SWEET MERCIFUL CRAP!
(Wario fires Waluigi at the large monkey... And misses, to his frustration. For their efforts, the two are knocked from Europe all the way to Japan.)
Scene 3[]
(The brothers land in front of the ruins of a temple.)
Wario: Wow!
(Dreaming about how rich he will be, Wario runs in and finds a hole in the corner, indicating the entrance. Waluigi, meanwhile, is still traumatized by the pummeling DK gave him and refuses to go in. Not even money can get his mind off it... But buff men can, as Waluigi rushes down the hole.)
(Inside, they come across a room with nothing but hieroglyphs on the walls. They search high and low, but a single penny in sight. But soon, Wario comes across a button to press that would supposedly give him "frea muney". Imagining the button as a coin (Also, DK returns and chases Waluigi around.), he presses it... Nothing. Nothing but a Bob-Omb drops from the ceiling and lands on Waluigi. Wario presses the button again. Out pops another Bob-Omb. He presses many times, and each time is a Bob-Omb. Fed up, he rapidly presses, and rapidly does the room fill with Bob-Ombs. Tired and at his wits end, he looks back... And sees the room is filled with a large amount of the walking explosives, with Waluigi tired from all the running and dodging.)
Wario: OH, WHAT THE FU-
(The temple explodes and sends the duo flying to a small island.)
Scene 4[]
(After a hard landing, Wario gets up and ascends a staircase. At the top, he finds a key sitting on a pedestal. Wario imagines shutting Waluigi up by throwing it at him. Wario takes the key off, and in its place, puts Waluigi.)
Waluigi: (Dances) Waluigi Time! (He falls off.)
(Suddenly, the ground begins to quake as a Chain Chomp slams down behind them.)
Wario and Waluigi: WHAT THE F*CK IS THAT!?
(The Chain Chomp begins to chase them all around the world. Soon, Waluigi's watch goes off.)
Waluigi: Tea time!
(Later, the brothers are sitting on the ground drinking tea when Mario arrives.)
Mario: Hey, I'm-a thirsty. You got something to drinky?
Waluigi: NO!
(Frustrated, Mario steals their tea set.)
Mario: B!tch!
(He runs off as the Chain Chomp continues chasing the brothers.)
Scene 5[]
(The brothers eventually find a cave. Entering, they find nothing but pitch black. A ghostly laughter is heard as the lights turn on. They find out that the cave hides an underground castle. Dreaming of turning it into a rave castle, Wario steps forward to continue the search for the treasure, only to run into the ghostly being that stole the map earlier.)
???: Hello... You are in a sacred place... The old Hyrule Castle... Do you know what this castle is for?
Wario: SWEET RAVE PARTY!
???: No...
Wario: I hate you!
???: This castle has gold... Money... Everything... And that key you have is the only way to find it... I've been searching for it forever... Now that you have it, we can find the treasure and all become rich!
Wario: That treasure is all mine!
???: If you plan to hog it all, you fatass, then I must use force... Give me that key!
(The ghost runs forward, but Wario throws the key at it, knocking it back.)
???: GOD, MY F*CKING KNEE! THAT'S MY KNEE! SH!T! AHHH, MAN...!
(Wario celebrates his victory and walks up to a button. He presses it, and the large statue in the center of the room moves, revealing a passageway. The brothers cheer, believing they are closer to the treasure.)
???: Help...
Scene 6[]
(Heading underground, the duo come across a room full of large statues, but no treasure in sight. Frustrated, Wario begins throwing a tantrum. He stops when he notices Waluigi leaving.)
(Wario follows Waluigi as they go over to a glowing keyhole.)
Wario: OH MY GOD!
(Wario inserts the key inside, and finally, they find their large treasure of gold.)
Wario: Ooooh yeaaah!
Waluigi: Oh yeah!
(...A certain ape was also hiding in there.)
Donkey Kong: It's r@ping time!
(The brothers scream in terror.)
(Credits roll.)